My Story

Hi there, welcome to my blog. Yes I am a drama queen and yes I have been deemed “infertile” by a few of the medical experts in the great State of Colorado but that hasn’t made me give up my quest to have children quite yet. My husband and I have been on the emotional roller coaster of infertility since March of 2009 when I stopped taking birth control after being on it for ten straight years. I have been keeping a journal since the start of this process and thought I would share it with all of the other incredible women out there who may be going through the same thing or similar thing that I am. At age 28, I have been diagnosed with Premature Ovarian Failure (POF). With no history of fertility problems on either side of my family and normal periods before going on the pill, I was left to accept that I have this condition and that there is no medical explanation for it. Since receiving this diagnosis from a fertility specialist in May 2009, I decided I simply wasn’t going to accept that I wasn’t going to have children with my own eggs. I jumped into the world of Eastern Medicine, worked with an Endocrinologist and even went on a fertility diet trying to get my ovaries to start functioning normally. The conclusion I have come to is this…..having Celiac Disease (Gluten/Flour intolerance) and continuing to eat flour throughout most of my childhood and part of adulthood caused my body to produce anti-bodies that have now started attacking the organs/glands in my body. After a visit to an endocrinologist in December 2009, it was determined that I have ovarian antibodies which are essentially antibodies produced by my body that only attack the endocrine system. No doctor has actually confirmed my self diagnosis that the Gluten Intolerance caused this but Celiac Disease is an auto immune disorder and any auto immune disorder can cause your body to attack itself. I am currently waiting to see a Reproductive Endocrinologist to see what the next steps for me will be. I have read that doctors can try and stimulate the Pituitary Gland to get your Endocrine System running again or that you can be given steroids to help restore ovary function. I am hoping to receive one of these treatments in the near future but only time will tell. In the past 10 months, I have watched many of my close friends become pregnant while I remain a sad statistic. This blog contains my thoughts as I struggle through the process of figuring out what in the world is going on with my body and how I continue to try to stay upbeat and positive about my fertility and enjoy my life. I hope that my blog can help others would love to hear from other women going through the same thing, inspiring stories or anyone who just needs encouragement. I know and understand how difficult every day can be once you have received the POF or infertile diagnosis and want you all to know that I am here for you. Please note that some of you may feel I am sharing to much information (TMI) and for that I am sorry. If you want to read my blog…you get all the details. You never know what will be helpful to someone else right? God bless everyone and I wish you luck on your fertility adventures:0) Remember mind over matter!

My intent is to raise awareness of the issues. Please do not rely on this or any other article when making decisions that will affect you and your health. These are things I have decided to try after much research.
I am sorry I have to even ask, but this research stuff is starting to get expensive. I am just asking for $1.00 donation for posts you feel have helped you. I will use all donations to help fund my research and doctors appointments and of course report back to you. Baby dust to all of you and dont worry we will all find a way to have children.

Please Help Fund My Research

Economically Organic

Today on Economically Organic:
Save the carrot shaving from your juicer and make carrot cake or carrot muffins yummy! You can also save them to put in a salad.

Infertile – a horrible word used to make women who are already feeling bad about themselves want to jump into a pool of chocolate fudge and eat their sorrows away only to realize that not only can they not get pregnant but now they don’t fit in their clothes. A word so easily tossed around by doctors that they don’t even realize they are saying it and a word that you never under any circumstances should google unless you want your brain to explode.

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

The Climb..and a new Organically Economic Section to the Blog..You're Welcome!

After work yesterday, I dropped by to see my tax lady so that I could pay her for her services and get the paperwork my husband needed to fill out. While we were talking about how much this year’s damage was, I told her we were working on the “no baby” thing but wasn’t sure how long it was going to take. I was surprised that as I made the statement, I didn’t feel any doubt inside as I said it. When my husband and I had been sitting at the same desk only two months before, I had been devastated when the fact that we didn’t have a child was brought up. As I left with the addressed envelope to the IRS in my hand, my tax lady said “Thank you and I hope to see your baby next year.” I laughed (and not a fake laugh like it has previously been) and said “you never know.” As I got into my car, I thought “that’s right, you never know” and I told myself how proud I was of us. We were letting the situation go and letting nature take control. As I drove home, Miley Cyrus’s song “The Climb” came on and I found myself almost crying as I sang along. That song describes exactly how I feel right now and it’s true that it isn’t about how fast I get to my goal, it’s about how I get there. Sorry for getting cheesy on you but if you haven’t heard this song look at the lyrics, ( it is a very inspiring song. I am sad to report that I am going to cancel my colon cleanse and reschedule at a later date. I decided this after my husband made a good point. He told me that I needed to be careful (since I tend to rush into things) and make sure I am going to someone with a good track record because if someone doesn’t know that they are doing, they could quote “mess you up for life.” I decided that he is right especially when it comes to such an invasive thing like cleaning out my colon. I have left messages for a few of my doctors to try and get a referral and then I will re-schedule. Speaking of my colon and digestion….I am now going not only once but twice a day! I know this subject is so lady like to discuss and that you were dying to know how frequent my trips to the restroom to visit Mr. Hanky are but that is yet another positive side effect from my diet change! I have gone from sometime not even going once day to going twice a day! I have also had cramps the last few mornings and am wondering what the heck that is about? I was thinking this morning though that maybe they are different cramps and not what I am thinking they are. Is it possible that it have been so long since I had a period that I have forgotten what menstrual cramps feel like? I personally don’t think it is possible to forget what these types of cramps feel like but it is something to think about. At least now I know that whatever the cramps are, they are a result of something my body is doing naturally and not the progesterone supplements which I have officially been off of for one month today. As discussed in the Economically Correct section of my blog, I found some classes that I am going to take in order to try and relieve stress and learn how to meditate effectively. My first class is this Saturday, April 17th and is about Finding Freedom with Sedona Method Releasing. According to the add, it will teach me to let go of feelings and beliefs that are causing me to suffer. It sounds interesting and is only $15.00. There are two others next week I am also interested in one is called “Co-Creating Friednships:Removing Geopathic Stress from your Environment” ($10) and the other “Spirituality, Meditation and Self-hypnosis” (free). I believe attending these classes will teach me how to let daily stressors go and also introduce me to people who are also trying to heal their bodies. This will allow me to continue to grow my already amazing support group. Don’t worry, I am not going to stop shaving my under arms or wearing shoes. I just think I need to learn to be more laid back. I tend to be very high strung and come from a long line of people in the same boat. My grandfather, I’m told, was a very high strung individual as are my mother and most of her four brothers. I am sure it is part of causes me to be such a drama queen. Part of healing is taking “quiet” time for your body to just focus on healing and I need to learn how to do that effectively without one of my Chihuahuas biting me on the nose in the middle of my yoga breathing.

Reading Materials/Other Items That Have Helped Me

  • Inconceivable
  • Making Babies by Sami S. David, MD & Jill Blakeway, LAc
  • pre-seed Fertility-friendly Intimate Moisturizer
  • restoring fertility - yoga for optimal fertility dvd - you can feel it working!
  • Taking Charge for Your Fertility by Toni Weschler, MPH
  • The Infertility Cure by Randin Lewis, Ph. D.