Confessions of an Infertile? Drama Queen: Mar 19, 2012

My Story

Hi there, welcome to my blog. Yes I am a drama queen and yes I have been deemed “infertile” by a few of the medical experts in the great State of Colorado but that hasn’t made me give up my quest to have children quite yet. My husband and I have been on the emotional roller coaster of infertility since March of 2009 when I stopped taking birth control after being on it for ten straight years. I have been keeping a journal since the start of this process and thought I would share it with all of the other incredible women out there who may be going through the same thing or similar thing that I am. At age 28, I have been diagnosed with Premature Ovarian Failure (POF). With no history of fertility problems on either side of my family and normal periods before going on the pill, I was left to accept that I have this condition and that there is no medical explanation for it. Since receiving this diagnosis from a fertility specialist in May 2009, I decided I simply wasn’t going to accept that I wasn’t going to have children with my own eggs. I jumped into the world of Eastern Medicine, worked with an Endocrinologist and even went on a fertility diet trying to get my ovaries to start functioning normally. The conclusion I have come to is this…..having Celiac Disease (Gluten/Flour intolerance) and continuing to eat flour throughout most of my childhood and part of adulthood caused my body to produce anti-bodies that have now started attacking the organs/glands in my body. After a visit to an endocrinologist in December 2009, it was determined that I have ovarian antibodies which are essentially antibodies produced by my body that only attack the endocrine system. No doctor has actually confirmed my self diagnosis that the Gluten Intolerance caused this but Celiac Disease is an auto immune disorder and any auto immune disorder can cause your body to attack itself. I am currently waiting to see a Reproductive Endocrinologist to see what the next steps for me will be. I have read that doctors can try and stimulate the Pituitary Gland to get your Endocrine System running again or that you can be given steroids to help restore ovary function. I am hoping to receive one of these treatments in the near future but only time will tell. In the past 10 months, I have watched many of my close friends become pregnant while I remain a sad statistic. This blog contains my thoughts as I struggle through the process of figuring out what in the world is going on with my body and how I continue to try to stay upbeat and positive about my fertility and enjoy my life. I hope that my blog can help others would love to hear from other women going through the same thing, inspiring stories or anyone who just needs encouragement. I know and understand how difficult every day can be once you have received the POF or infertile diagnosis and want you all to know that I am here for you. Please note that some of you may feel I am sharing to much information (TMI) and for that I am sorry. If you want to read my blog…you get all the details. You never know what will be helpful to someone else right? God bless everyone and I wish you luck on your fertility adventures:0) Remember mind over matter!

My intent is to raise awareness of the issues. Please do not rely on this or any other article when making decisions that will affect you and your health. These are things I have decided to try after much research.

Monday, March 19, 2012

day 1

Ok so I have not posted in awhile and I promise I will post all my entries since September sometime soon. I wanted to share will ya'll that today is Day 1 of my future children's lives. My husband and I are in the middle of our first IVF cycle. Yesterday was egg retrieval and the sperm collection. We were able to get 20 eggs and very good sperm. This morning I got the phone call from the embryology department at the fertility clinic and....14 of the 20 fertilized!!! We are so excited. This takes the pressure off in case the first round doesnt work and makes me able to be more at ease. We are pretty confident that this will work though. The embryologist told us that with my age and transferring two embryos (which is what we have chosen to do) we have over 85% chance of conceiving one child and 65% chance of having twins. I know it sounds crazy but we are very excited as the possibility of having twins. It would be the opposite of what we have been dealing with for the past three years. I am so excited and dont know how I will get through this week. Our transfer is this Friday, March 23rd and we will find out about 9 days later if it took.

here is what the embryos look like today on day 1. Crazy to see what usually happens naturally in the body isnt it? The second photo is what a healthy embryo should look like on day two.