My Story

Hi there, welcome to my blog. Yes I am a drama queen and yes I have been deemed “infertile” by a few of the medical experts in the great State of Colorado but that hasn’t made me give up my quest to have children quite yet. My husband and I have been on the emotional roller coaster of infertility since March of 2009 when I stopped taking birth control after being on it for ten straight years. I have been keeping a journal since the start of this process and thought I would share it with all of the other incredible women out there who may be going through the same thing or similar thing that I am. At age 28, I have been diagnosed with Premature Ovarian Failure (POF). With no history of fertility problems on either side of my family and normal periods before going on the pill, I was left to accept that I have this condition and that there is no medical explanation for it. Since receiving this diagnosis from a fertility specialist in May 2009, I decided I simply wasn’t going to accept that I wasn’t going to have children with my own eggs. I jumped into the world of Eastern Medicine, worked with an Endocrinologist and even went on a fertility diet trying to get my ovaries to start functioning normally. The conclusion I have come to is this…..having Celiac Disease (Gluten/Flour intolerance) and continuing to eat flour throughout most of my childhood and part of adulthood caused my body to produce anti-bodies that have now started attacking the organs/glands in my body. After a visit to an endocrinologist in December 2009, it was determined that I have ovarian antibodies which are essentially antibodies produced by my body that only attack the endocrine system. No doctor has actually confirmed my self diagnosis that the Gluten Intolerance caused this but Celiac Disease is an auto immune disorder and any auto immune disorder can cause your body to attack itself. I am currently waiting to see a Reproductive Endocrinologist to see what the next steps for me will be. I have read that doctors can try and stimulate the Pituitary Gland to get your Endocrine System running again or that you can be given steroids to help restore ovary function. I am hoping to receive one of these treatments in the near future but only time will tell. In the past 10 months, I have watched many of my close friends become pregnant while I remain a sad statistic. This blog contains my thoughts as I struggle through the process of figuring out what in the world is going on with my body and how I continue to try to stay upbeat and positive about my fertility and enjoy my life. I hope that my blog can help others would love to hear from other women going through the same thing, inspiring stories or anyone who just needs encouragement. I know and understand how difficult every day can be once you have received the POF or infertile diagnosis and want you all to know that I am here for you. Please note that some of you may feel I am sharing to much information (TMI) and for that I am sorry. If you want to read my blog…you get all the details. You never know what will be helpful to someone else right? God bless everyone and I wish you luck on your fertility adventures:0) Remember mind over matter!

My intent is to raise awareness of the issues. Please do not rely on this or any other article when making decisions that will affect you and your health. These are things I have decided to try after much research.
I am sorry I have to even ask, but this research stuff is starting to get expensive. I am just asking for $1.00 donation for posts you feel have helped you. I will use all donations to help fund my research and doctors appointments and of course report back to you. Baby dust to all of you and dont worry we will all find a way to have children.

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Infertile – a horrible word used to make women who are already feeling bad about themselves want to jump into a pool of chocolate fudge and eat their sorrows away only to realize that not only can they not get pregnant but now they don’t fit in their clothes. A word so easily tossed around by doctors that they don’t even realize they are saying it and a word that you never under any circumstances should google unless you want your brain to explode.

Sunday, November 28, 2010

Still Waiting....

As I sit here preparing to go back to work after a long 6 days off, I am still waiting to find out what exactly it was that I felt two weeks ago today. My acupuncturist and I both believe it was me ovulating but after many let downs during this entire process I am afraid to get my hopes up.  Since last Tuesday, I have had runny almost water like CM and a dull cramp on my right side.  I have had some breast tenderness and for the past two days have felt sick after eating my first meal of the day. Could I be pregnant? Or is this just me messing with my own head again?  I was told to wait another full week to take a test but am going to report these symtoms to Jeff tomorrow and see what he thinks.  I have read that a lot of CM like I have been experiencing could be early pregnancy symptoms, I pray that this is what is happening with my body.  Only 7 more days until I find out....I can wait 7 more days....can't I?

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Counting My Eggs Before They Have Hatched??

The weekend was filled with surprises. During my acupuncture on Friday, I had twitches all over the place which is a good thing because it shows activity. The CU Buffaloes & Denver Broncos actually won a game and I had some activity in what felt like both of my ovaries on Saturday and again on Sunday. On Saturday, I was standing at the CU tailgate munching on my breakfast when both my ovaries started to hurt. It was almost like a dull pain kind of like a pinching sensation on both sides. This went on for most of the afternoon and evening. I was talking about it with my mother in law and she smiled and said “maybe you are about to release an egg”. I laughed it off thinking in my head “yeah right” and went on to the football game. When we got home, I put a heating pad over my lower belly while doing my nightly foot soak and fell asleep not really thinking much of it. The last time I was on progesterone supplements, I had cramping just about everyday. This was a bit different then the cramping I had before but I just figured it was yet another side effect. I woke up pretty early on Sunday morning to go and spend the day with my family. I got ready and made it to their house in under an hour. We ate breakfast (yummy gluten free bisquick pancakes) and as my mom and I were cleaning the dishes, I all of a sudden got an explosive pain on my lower right side where I believe my right ovary to be. It wasn’t extremely painful, almost felt like something had burst and followed by a dull pain that lasted for about an hour. I sat down at the kitchen table and drank some warm green tea while I waited for the pain to go away and sent my husband this text “Something just happened but I’m not sure what. Got an intense pain on my right side of my uterus that lasted for about an hour.” Not a wife’s typical text to a husband but I guess we are not the typical couple. Sadly, these types of texts have become normal with us. I update him on all changes I feel in my body….I know what you are thinking...lucky him. As I sat there waiting for the pain to go away, my mind started racing. “What if the was implantation? No silly that couldn’t be, you haven’t been ovulating, this is your first month on the hormones. What could it be then??? Could it actually be ovulation? Or what if it was a cyst? No, I couldn’t have that bad of luck, could I?” Since this happened, I have really been trying hard to keep my promise to the hubby and focus on something else but I am failing miserably. I came in to work this morning and immediately starting doing research. According to what I read, I either ovulated or have ovarian cysts. I am going with the first one….something to celebrate! It is so great because my husband and I had “time together” on Saturday night right before Mr. or Mrs. Egg (I don’t discriminate) popped out. Now the race is on to catch the egg. I am picturing a fun game of little sperm racing with the egg. I should call the next couple of days “As the Sperm Swim”. Couldn’t have timed it better if I were actually using all of the ovulation devices I have in my bathroom drawer. I feel like I could be jinxing things by talking about it like counting my eggs before they are hatched only in my case before they are fertilized. Oh well, the fact that I am feeling any changes at all is truly a blessing with the already amazing changes I have felt since starting the hormones and DHEA. Anything else on top of feeling like I am supposed to will just be an added bonus. I have an appointment with Jeff this week and I am very excited to tell him what has happened since our last meeting on Friday and see what he has to say.

So just got back from my appointment with Jeff and “Houston we have received confirmation.” It is in his expert opinion (not just mine) that I ovulated on Sunday!!! As soon as he said it I immediately started crying and thinking in my head “Holy Shit”. Excuse my French but never in my wildest dreams did I ever think any of the things I am doing would work. I mean I have always had hope but man I never thought this would happen the first cycle on the hormones and only after seeing Jeff for a month!!!! I have officially experienced a miracle! I have gone from being told in May of 2009 that I had flat ovaries with no eggs, to a year later March 2010 being told I had round ovaries with standing follicles to this week being told that I have officially ovulated. Say it with me now Holy Sh_t!!!!! Jeff did say to not get my hopes up. That my body is still adjusting to trying to work properly again and that although a pregnancy is possible this month, we should concentrate on being happy with what I have already gotten out of my body this month. I told him I had no problem with that and that I wouldn’t be devasted if a pregnancy didn’t happen this month. Jeff told me no heavy working out, to cancel an allergy testing appointment I had scheduled for this Friday and to continue to be religious about doing my nightly footbaths. As I laid there during my treatment, I picture an egg with arms, legs and a smiley face walking through a fallopian tube with a flash light who is met by a new swimming friend. The two of them join up and navigate through the tube and into the uterus together and then find a permanent home to put stakes in and start building their new temporary home. Silly I know but I fell asleep halfway through this ridiculous story building. When I woke up I was ready to face the rest of my work day and wait on my husband to call with results from his doctor’s appointment. The holiday season can’t possibly get any better! I already have my Christmas miracle. Thank you Lord for blessing me with this new beginning, I pray that it eventually leads to another miracle but it waits on you :0) Just wanted to welcome little Julia into the world. She was born last week but this is my first post since then. Congrats S & D on a beautiful baby girl!

Sunday, November 14, 2010

A Double Hit From the Stun Gun

I was still feeling really good as I drove into work today. I have been considering making some professional changes to my life but am worried I might get pregnant in the midst of the changes. During our daily morning phone call, I expressed this concern with my mother who then replied “well remember you are talking about one to ten percent that may even be an option”. That comment just hit me like a stun gun and I didn’t talk for a full minute while I let the sting wear off. I rejoined the conversation as my mother called my name for the fifth time to see if I was still there. I then replied with “did you just say that to me?” I absolutely love my mother and I could not have gotten through this whole ordeal without her but it is statements like that which show me that she just plain does not understand what I am going through. Statements like “1 in 10% chance” or “there are other options” or “you are not dying” are statements that people in my situation really can’t stand to hear. I believe that being positive and not making statements that make the other person want to shrink into a ball and roll off into the distance is better for everyone. People who make statements like those I just mentioned are able to say those things because they have not had to deal with a fertility issue. It’s not their fault, it’s not the fertility patient’s fault either but it really does suck. Another thing I have recently learned is that my loved ones have been keeping pregnancies of people around us a secret from me. That is extra fun when I find out because then I get a dose of “I feel stupid that people have to keep things from me” mixed with “what the hell is wrong with me, why can’t I get pregnant.” I know people think they are doing the right thing not telling me but it makes it so much worse finding out through a third party. Ok, enough depressing talk. I am still feeling so happy and encouraged. We continue to be on the two year plan which has allowed me to be able to think about something else throughout the work days and actually become productive at work again.

And Finally Some Good News

As I sit here in at my desk and watch the first snow flakes of the season start to fall, I am still amazed at how great I have been feeling. The newly added hormones and DHEA have been such a great addition to my daily routine. I just had lunch with a friend of mine who suffered the horrible tragedy of loosing her full term baby about two years ago. She is now 10 weeks along and I am so happy for her...probably would have cried when she told me if my new drugs didn’t make me so darn happy all the time….not complaining at all. I was feeling pretty good after our lunch. Got back to work, stole a reeses pieces out of a coworkers snack drawer and was working along. A visit to the restroom brought on more good news. It appears that I have a large amount of clear, stretchy CM. I noticed it a bit this morning but thought nothing of it but this afternoon it is very obvious what is going on ….the estrogen is causing me to have a cycle!!!! I of course got out of the bathroom as fast as I could and called my mother and husband to which I got the response “um that’s great, you have good mucus?” They just don’t understand what a breakthrough this is. I know mucus is not that great of a conversation topic but I’ve got it and I don’t care who knows.

I was so glad that I had an acupuncture appointment; I knew Jeff would share in my mucus excitement. He was indeed very excited to hear of the changes I have been seeing and we discussed things I needed to be sure and do (besides my husband) the next few days. As soon as the needles were placed over my ovaries, I felt a sharp twitch on the right side. Right about that time, Jeff asked if I felt any twitches and when I told him yes, he smiled and said that’s good. Dying to know why that was “good,” I asked what it meant and he told me that it meant there was activity where ever the twitch was occurring. I replied with “it’s about time”. Jeff then responded with “it’s been a long time, so it may take awhile to wake your ovaries up.” I was sure to let him know I had been talking to my ovaries and not him when I had said “it’s about time”, didn’t want to piss the person off with the needles. As I was left to doze off for my 45 minute treatment, it took a minute for my mind to relax with all of the good news I had received throughout the day. My friend had gotten pregnant, I seemed to be responding to my new medicine pretty early in the process and the first snow was falling. I was just too happy to sleep….but I did it anyway. Jeff woke me up, went over the game plan (intercourse at least twice in the next couple of days and foot baths) and I was sent on my way to fight the traffic caused by the first signs of winter. I didn’t care about the traffic though, I just sat in traffic listening to my Beth Moore bible study..nothing, not even the butt who cut me off because he didn’t want to wait in line, could ruin my day.

Sunday, November 7, 2010

Love Thy Hormones

If one more person asks me if I am feeling ok, I am going to scream!! Everyone at my office & at home seems to think I am not feeling well because I seem relaxed and have been really laid back. Come to think of it, I feel really relaxed and laid back (am I that big of a stress case that people immediately notice when I start to relax???....I even know that answer to that question, after all stress is my middle name. I am proud to say that I now know what it feels like to not be stressed out throughout each and every work day. I don’t know if it is my new jasmine dispensing air freshener in my office, the new heating pad I have brought to work (to keep my uterus warm…I didn’t say it wasn’t weird but I have read it works), the DHEA supplements or the low dose hormones but I have to say I feel fantastic. Until recently I always seemed to have a tiny headache all the time, and I just noticed yesterday that it is gone. I feel like my head is clear and I am able to remember things more easily. My skin also seems to have a new glow to it… I am basically in a constant state of euphoria :0) I noticed the change in my mood on Monday night and have already decided that the low dose hormones were exactly what I needed and even if they don’t eventually help me conceive naturally, it was the right decision to start taking them. My hormones were hanging on to healthy levels by a tiny hair like thread and the new addition has knocked them into what feels like fully functioning doses.  I am hopeful I will continue to feel even better as the months pass.  I am really interested to see if the DHEA will have any amazing effects on me as it did for the woman in the article I shared with you in my last post. If it made the patient in the article’s 46 year old ovaries behave like they were 20, will it make my 29 year old ovaries behave like they are 14?  Let’s hope so but let’s shoot for after the onset of menses because pre-puberty would be no period and I already know what that feels like :0)  I have a new strategy for every time I start to think about my fertility. I start taking deep breathes and concentrate on my breathing. When you do that not only does it relax your body but trying to focus on taking deep breaths helps clear your mind as well.  Hopefully after awhile I will program myself to not think about it. After all, I don’t have to worry until November 2012 so let the fun begin :0)

Hormones Here I Come!

I learned some things this week. One, although I thought it sounded amazing, staying in hotel connected to a Galleria is just not a good thing. Two, not everyone has the same understanding of personal space. Three, Continental Airlines doesn’t have rows 13 or 33 and on some of my flights they do not have a row 9 either….dont understand any of these except for the 13. I was lucky enough to get to go to a great women’s conference in Houston, TX this week. The conference and my room were both in the Westin which is connected to the galleria. Being the fashionista I believe myself to be, I thought that was great….but now that I am home looking at my bank account and all my new treasures….I realize that I probably should have stayed somewhere else or hidden my wallet from myself. Whenever I go to Texas for work or play, I come back feeling like a young teenager again. I grew up in Texas and moved to Denver when I was 18. Visiting the lone star state gives me the sense that I am young, rich and free of all the problems I normally deal with on a daily basis. I often return with a renewed sense of self and fashion followed by a few weeks of “what the heck should I wear this with.” While traveling from Denver to Houston, I had a few encounters with the same woman. On the shuttle ride from the check in terminal to the gate, her luggage fell on me twice then as we were getting off the shuttle she hit my heels with her bag. Taking a deep breath I just smiled and said it was ok after all I would probably never see her again. Well I was wrong, the flight attendants were getting ready to close the door to the plane when in runs the same woman from the shuttle. I took a deep breath and watched as she passed each row and stopped in front on mine. She threw her bag up in the overhead compartment and started climbing over me before I told her I was going to get up. What are the chances the same woman from the shuttle would be sitting right next to me on the plane??? Well to finish the experience with this woman, as it came time for our row to exit the plane she started pushing me out in the aisle at the same time the woman that had been sitting in front of me started taking down her bag from the over head bin. Her bag, fell directly on my head and everyone around us gasped. Only then did the woman from the shuttle back off and sit back in her seat. I just looked at my friends who had been on the flight and laughed it off rubbing my head as I walked off the plane. As for the missing rows in Continental planes, I have no idea why they do that. I understand why they don’t want a 13th row but don’t know why they wouldn’t have a 9 or 33 or if it was just that particular plane??? As I returned home from the conference I was anxious to get through my last day of work for the week so I could go to my doctors appointment. Hormone day, it was finally here! I had been preparing for it all month with acupuncture and working out.

My husband and I went to see Dr. Santorro. I had asked her to describe what IVF with donor eggs process was like for him (just in case). He has stated before that he is really against it but I wanted him to have the facts. After a demonstration, Dr. Santorro stated that the estrogen I was going to be taking was estrodiol and that it would be in a patch I was to wear directly above my hip and change twice a week. I was also to take progesterone on the 1st through the 12th of every month. This combination would help me ovulate. Then the doctor explained that she also wanted me to start taking 50mg of DHEA a day. I freaked out a bit inside as she also explained the side effects which included acne and facial hair. My husband looked over and said “if you get a mustache we wont have to worry about trying to have a baby” and we all laughed. I was thinking to myself “to bad I already have one and just rinse it off every month”….but I guess what men don’t know doesn’t scare them :0)

I was feeling pretty good about things when my doctor started describing POF and that most of the time someone with POF has a 10% change of getting pregnant. This made me cringe as she went through the statistics and as she kept talking I felt my positive attitude slowly wither away. To change the mood I interrupted her and said “so when I get pregnant, because I know this is going to work, what do I need to do. Do I need to stop taking any of these medications or keep taking them?” The doctor replied with “good, I’m glad you feel this is going to work. When you get pregnant, you will want to stop taking the DHEA. We will keep you on the estrodiol and progesterone because they are a very low dose and will be good for the baby.” She handed me the prescription write ups and said “good luck.” I was thinking to myself as we walked to the car. I am already having to worry about my hormone levels, premature aging and weight gain but now the doctor has added possible adult acne and access facial hair to the picture….I was picturing myself waking up one day and looking like the princess on the Shrek movie.

I could tell my husband was really bumming on the ride home from the appointment so I decided to break the silence with “you know babe, they gave us a 0% chance one year ago and we can’t assume my body is the same as another woman’s so we have a good chance.” He stayed quiet for about 15 minutes which made me sit there and wonder if I should have just stayed quiet and not said anything. After about 15 minutes he replied with “that’s true, we should give it about two years and then if we still haven’t gotten pregnant then I think we should look into IVF.” Wow, two years of waiting….can I do that???? You know what, I think I can. I am fine with the fact that this is plain and simple just not my time to become a mother. God knows best. So I am officially going to concentrate my energy on taking care of myself, my marriage, my family and getting a new home ready for when the time finally comes. I have been doing a lot o thinking in the past couple of days and I came up with this….I have accepted that maybe if in two years I have still not gotten pregnant that must mean that my eggs are no good. Meaning, I could possible pass on something to my child that I wouldn’t want to such as leukemia, colon cancer, liver problems, diabetes and my favorite Celiacs Disease. It seems that genetic diseases are getting worse with each generation and perhaps me not being able to get pregnant naturally is God saving my husband and I from an even bigger heartbreak of having a sick child and loosing them at a young age? Or even worse having a child with so many problems they wouldn’t be able to fully enjoy their lives. I have come to the realization that I need to stop pushing for this to happen, there is a reason it isn’t happening right now even if I don’t understand it right now. So this is me, taking an oath with my hand over my glamour magazine “Lord, I promise to stop being so pushy on restoring my fertility and understand that things will happen in your time and not mine. Please however understand that I may be exploring other options come December of 2012 as I will see that as my sign that is what I am supposed to do.” Ok, I feel better already.

When my husband and I went to pick up some DHEA at vitamin cottage I was a little shocked when they vitamin expert told us that they didn’t carry it due to it’s side effects. They had a whole sheet explaining why they refused to carry it. A bit worried, we walked across the street to the Sunflower Market to see if they carried it. They had four different brands so my husband and I split the bunch to read the labels and were able to find one that was gluten free. On the way home, my husband expressed his concern on me taking the supplement and I told him that the sheet from vitamin cottage state patients were fine to take it under a doctor’s care. A bit worried myself, I decided to do some research when I got home. I found an amazing article on DHEA. Here is the link The article states that DHEA “ is a relatively recent development in the treatment of premature ovarian aging but in a very short time has demonstrated remarkable results in the treatment of prematurely aging ovaries. Effects can only be summarized as rejuvenating ovarian function.” I was so excited to read this first part of the article that I had to stop, print it to PDF and send to my family members before I even finished the rest of the article. It goes on to explain how a patient started taking DHEA on her own before starting an IVF treatment. “She greatly increased the number of eggs in her next IVF treatment and the doctors were wondering what had caused these results. After investigating, it was found that after taking the DHEA for only 4 months, the 43 year old woman’s ovaries were behaving like those of a woman in her 20’s.” As I continued to read on I found a list of “Highlights of DHEA effects”. Some of them were increases egg & embryo counts, improves eggs & embryo quality, speeds up time to pregnancy in fertility treatment, increases spontaneously conceived pregnancies (my favorite one), and another favorite decreases spontaneous miscarriage rates. There was also another list of non-fertility related positive side effects which are improved overall feeling, physically stronger, improved sex drive, mentally sharper and better memory. My husband and I both decided that maybe some unwanted facial hair could be considered acceptable for a supplement that could do all of this….I have been taking it for four days now and so far no sign of any hair growth or acne and I feel really happy. I am just going to move on to a new obsession for awhile and worry about this in two years. Don’t worry I will continue to write about things that may or may not be happening. I am simply saying I have nothing to be upset about so I will no longer be spending my days feeling sorry for myself. The options are endless and I am only 29, I have many years to worry about how I am going to have a child.

Sunday, October 17, 2010

PMS Perhaps??

My second acupuncture treatment of the week was really good and seems to have knocked something loose because I woke up this morning with what I think are cramps and a bit of PMS. I am saying this because I might have snapped at my husband and my mother for no reason and seem to be crying at everything today.  During my treatment, my left food twitched the entire 30 while the needle was in.  Somehow, I was able to fall asleep an woke up as Jeff walked back in.  I also started another herb, menotrol, that I am to take three, three times a day with the current one until the current one is out.  I pray that the herbs, combined with acupuncture and/or the hormone doses I will start at the end of this month will restore my period. Lord, I know I am to wait on you and when it is my time I will have my monthly gift from mother nature back but I don’t know how much longer I can wait. I will say that I woke up the past two days with cramps that required time under a heating pad, I am snapping at my poor husband for now reason and crying over nothing so it appears that I could be PMSing. All I remember about PMS as a teenager was having zero control over my emotions and snapping at my poor mother for no reason.  Even my husband asked if I had PMS. Usually any normal women would get really angry if their husbands said that to them but I got a huge smile on my face and replied “I hope so!” Anyway, I really hope that my time is near. Don’t get me wrong Lord, I am happy helping others but it is getting really hard to watch everyone around me have children while I continue to anxiously await the arrival of mother nature for my long and overdue gift. I know this is sad, but I even cut out a Tampax add with mother nature holding a monthly gift so I can look at it while I walk on the treadmill at night. I think if I call her to come visit me she will. We used to have 7 days visits every month! How could she just stop visiting completely with no warning!! Or at least without a warning I could recognize as a warning! I just found out via my mother today that my cousin and his girlfriend of only a few months are pregnant with their first baby. I was standing in line at Panera Bread Company waiting to order some lunch when my mom told me. I started crying but I didn’t dare step out of line and loose my spot so I stood their crying like a freak until I could order my food. I could tell the people in back of me wanted my spot and I was not giving it up for anything…after all now I needed to eat away my sad feelings so I needed the food more then they did.  I got my food and walked very quickly to my car, hung up the phone and let the tears fall. I decided that again things happen for a reason and that the baby my cousin and his soon to be wife are expecting was meant for them, it is supposed to be and maybe for a reason non of us can see right now…point being I needed to stop making it about me and stop crying which I did pretty easily….after I bought myself a new pair of boots.  I thought I had gotten over the PMS thing and another family member having a baby until I tried to go run an errand for my husband at the local mall. I found a parking spot up front and walked in excited to walk around for awhile. Two hours later I walked out, bags in hand and feeling relaxed and ready to go home and tackle some more chores. I looked for my car, and looked for my car and looked for my car. I looked for my car for 45 minutes and then finally gave in and called my husband to come help me. I was absolutely mortified that I forgot where I parked and by the time he came to my rescue I was sitting on a bench outside a store in tears. Who does that? I mean a child can remember where they park their bike so why can’t I remember where I parked my big refrigerator on wheels of a car?? To make matters worse, I had barely settled in to his truck we found my car about three seconds later. I had been sitting almost right next to it!!! My husband was laughing and telling me it wasn’t a big deal as I slammed the door and got in my car where I continued the crying all the way home. About two hours later I was still very embarrassed but feeling better about things when my husband came running down the stairs asking if I could help him. He had locked his keys in the car while the car was running and he didn’t have a spare….I realized that I wasn’t the only one who does dumb things and instantly felt better. Sometimes we need these types of moments to humble ourselves so that we don’t forget we are not perfect.

Saturday, October 16, 2010

Breaking Out the Big Guns

So you know how I wrote in my last entry that it seems that people are unloading their problems on me lately….like complete strangers?? Well I am beginning to really think that maybe that is my calling or something? I was just at the bank depositing a check. I waited in line and walk towards the teller as she motioned me forward. As I walked up she asked how I was doing to which I replied “pretty good, and you?” She then responded with “well I just broke up with my boyfriend of 3 years but other than I am fine.” This started a 15 minute conversation between the two of us that ended with my giving her the advice that she is the only that can control her happiness. How that conversation happened during a quick trip to the bank….I am not sure but just another encounter that makes me think I am going through this to help people. Does that sound weird?? I mentioned I had lunch with an incredibly strong woman last week who had lost a child?? Well she was nice enough to recommend a fertility acupuncturist whose office is about three minutes walking distance from mine. Even though I love Carol, my current acupuncturist, it has been awhile since I have seen her and I believe there is a reason I would meet my new friend and that she would recommend this new acupuncturist to me….so I made an appointment for this Friday. My plan is to ask for treatments to treat yin deficiency and help my body to suppress FSH and product more estrogen. This new acupuncturist works closely with many of the fertility specialists in the state and has knowledge of all the officers I have gone to in the last year and a half. I am very excited to get things started :0) I have been re-reading “Making Babies” and taking my own advise and am incorporating recommendations into my daily routine as I learn of them. Three of those are taking L-carnitine supplements, putting a heating pad on my lower abdomen for at least twenty minutes daily and incorporating Yin foods into my daily diet.

I continue to be amazed at women’s bodies and I mean that in a totally not creepy way. What I meant is that I keep hearing incredibly inspiring stories about women who have beat the odds and conceived. Yesterday a friend from work shared another with me about a close friend of hers who was recently diagnosed with ovarian cancer, had an ovary removed and went through chemo. On the day of her last chemo treatment, she found out she was pregnant. The baby is fine and she seems like she will be able to carry full term. My friend at work said that if the woman from the story could get pregnant while going through chemo and only have one ovary, then I would be just fine. She is right, I have two ovaries with follicles, just need to build up some estrogen to get them going again and stay positive. I went to the meeting with a new acupuncturist, Jeff, a few days ago. He seemed very up on his knowledge and I was very glad to see him when I got to the appointment. That day, Friday, was an “I’m feeling sorry for myself” day and was also very stressful at work. I was so stressed and exhausted that I welcomed the needles he was going to be sticking in me with open arms. When I arrived, we went through a questionnaire, discussed my current lifestyle and eating habits and he looked at my tongue a few times. For those of you who are not into Eastern medicine, practitioners believe you can tell a lot about a person simply by looking at their toungue. Mine, for example, let Jeff know that I was very imbalanced. Great, another man telling me I am unbalanced! Fortunately, this  imbalance can be fixed (not so sure on the others). After filling out my questionnaire, Jeff started my treatment. As I laid down on the treatment table, I felt a nice warm heating pad like object on my back. “Let the relaxation begin!” Next he placed a small heal lamp over my feet. As he started inserting the needles, I was surprised to find that every single needle he poked in made my body flinch. Again for those of you who have never done acupuncture, this means they are getting a good spot. Once the needles were in, Jeff asked if he could break out the big guns and wanting to be as aggressive as possible I said “but of course”. The “big guns” Jeff was referring to was a machine that hooks up to the needles and vibrates them intensifying the treatment. The needles we were focusing on were the ones place over both of my ovaries. It hurt at first but he explained that my body would regulate in just a minute and I would barely feel it and would fall asleep. He was right, I woke up to him knocking on the door. He removed the needles and explained the we were going to discuss the rest of my treatment and what would come next. While I took my needle induced siesta, Jeff had been grading my questionnaire and had a diagnosis and recommendations ready. According to what I filled out, I had six imbalances. Kidney yin, kidney yan, spleen chi deficiency, blood deficiency, live chi stagnation and heart stagnation. Yikes, just like any other test I have ever taken…..a negative result. Next came my question “do you think you can help me get my periods back?” to which he said “I don’t want to promise you anything but I am pretty confident we can have things back in 3-4 cycles.” Three of four months? I thought, well heck I can do that. Next we discussed doing two treatments a week to be a bit aggressive since it has almost been one year since my last period. Then Jeff gave me some instructions….no caffeine, no soda, carry lavender coated cutips in my purse and use them whenever I get stressed (he obviously doesn’t know I was born stressed and that to fulfill this request I would have to walk around with cutips up my nose 24 hours a day). I am also to drink things without ice at room temperature if possible and soak my feet in hot water every night before I go to bed. Next we went over a list of foods I should be eating they include but are not limited to: broccoli, asparagus, spinach, sea cucumber, yams, garlic, chives, orange sweet potatoes, black beans, black sesame, carrots and celery. Fruits goji berries, pomegranate, kiwi, figs and lots of pineapple. Proteins include salmon, mackerel, tuna steak, chicken, lamb and pork. Jeff suggested making a chicken soup and putting a bunch of the veggies he suggested and then add chicken off the bone. He said to take the chicken carcass and scrape the marrow off and put in the soup. Next we discussed how my exercise program could be whatever I wanted until I started a period and then I would have to calm things down a bit. But until then, Jeff suggested working out for 45 minutes, 5 days a week. I was given herbs to take (three, three times a day) and was also told I could drink alcohol but only red wine. At least he didn’t say no alcohol at all :0) I feel very encouraged and hopeful that with the acupuncture and low estrogen doses, I will have periods again in no time!

Sunday, October 3, 2010

A Thank You to Beth Moore & Helpful Info From Making Babies

I have kind of been taking it easy the last couple of weeks. I have been listening to a great bible study on the book of Esther in my car discussing how hard it is to be a woman which has really helped me through all of the thoughts running through my mind. I have also been really concentrating on getting my metabolism back, working out and playing catch up at work. I am feeling very at peace with myself lately, like I have all the time in the world to figure things out and that I should cherish every moment like it is my last. I have been making it a priority to take advantage of every opportunity that is thrown my way. Lunch/Dinner invitations, happy hours, shopping trips, phone calls, baseball/football games, parades, emails you name it, I have accepted it and haven’t really had time to think about “the things” I have been impatiently waiting to show up for almost a year and a half now. The Beth Moore bible study I have been listening to has a chapter on waiting. On the audio, Beth states that we need to learn that if something isn’t happening at the particular time we want it to happen that there is a reason for it. Although it is tough to admit, this is me in a nutshell. I have been focusing every thought and every minute of the past year and a half to try and get a period and/or get pregnant and all it has done is wear me out and get me even more down. It never occurred to me that perhaps someone up there might have a plan and that maybe me not being able to get pregnant right now is all part of a bigger plan. This bible study also talked about how sometimes God will bring a tragedy into our lives to help sort of turn us into the direction we are supposed to go in order to fulfill our destiny. Since starting my blog, I have learned so much about nutrition and fertility and have chatted with so many incredible women going through similar situations. I have been able to help people get pregnant by recommending books, nutritional changes and other things and am so happy I have been able to do that. I have also noticed lately that I have sort of become a “Dear Abby”. Just yesterday while I was sitting at work, I had three people come into my office and proceed to tell me a problem they were having and ask me what I thought they should do. While at lunch a few days ago with a coworker, it came out that she too was going through a horrible time after loosing a child at birth. This is something I can’t even imagine working through but there she sat, emotions intact, some people are just so much stronger then others. My point is that I believe God wants me to help people, specifically women and that is why I my ovaries have gone on vacation. I needed to go through this to figure out that I have a love for writing, nutrition and that I am interested in my fertility past what kind of tampons I want to buy each month. I have learned so much and after listening to this bible study am actually feeling like I have a purpose again. Sorry to get all bible happy on you but this chapter of esther study just hit home and the best part was that at the end the speaker said “you are just waiting on the things. You are waiting on that baby which is a really important thing to wait on but if you just believe in God and that he has a plan, it will eventually come.” This hit so close to home that I started crying in my car. I wasn’t in hysterics or anything but tears were falling from my eyes because I realized that the speaker was right. I was spending all my time waiting on the thing I wanted the most in this world instead of focusing on everything I have the ability to enjoy right now. Ironically after listening to this chapter of the study in my car, I received a call from my doctor with some urine and blood test results. My thyroid test was not back yet but my urine test suggested that I had a small infection that could be cured with cranberry juice. Next we discussed the fact that I seemed to be shedding more hair off my head then I have ever done before and she suggested maybe I come in for a follow up and we could run some tests and maybe try a low dose estrogen treatment. Having previously been told that HRT kept you from being able to get pregnant, I asked if this low dose treatment could hurt my changes of getting pregnant and she said no that if anything it might help it. She said it would mostly be to just try and balance me out a bit since women with POF tend to have lower amounts of estrogen then women with no fertility issues but that it might give me the extra boost I need to restore my periods. I told her I would think about it and she scheduled me to come in on October 29th. I felt good about that because it gave me a month to think things through. The entire next day I prayed that God would help me decide what to do. For the past 6 months I have been doing everything the natural ways. Taking myself off the progesterone and thyroid supplements and not going on HRT would starting the low dose estrogen erase everything I have been working towards? Or is it the missing link? I prayed that God would give me a sign on whether I should try the therapy and help guide me towards the right decision. After dinner that night, I went home ate dinner, got ready for bed and decided to pop open a book I have recommended to many women “Making Babies.” I had already read many different sections of this book over three times but I thought maybe there was something I had missed. Turns out I was right. There is an entire section on POF and treatments/nutritional changes you can try along with success stories of treatments. Guess what? Right there one of the pages was a success story about a woman with POF who made a few diet/lifestyle changes I have already made and took a low dose estrogen and got pregnant. If that isn’t the sign I was praying for I don’t know what is! As I finished reading that section I marked the page, closed the book, turned off the lamp and looked up at God and said “ok…I will try it, thank you for your help.” I know it sounds corny and that there are many of you non believers out there but why would I choose to open a book I have read so many times and happen to find a section regarding the one subject I had prayed about ….things like this just have to make you think. I will be doing research and have my folder armed and ready by the time October 29th rolls around. At least I feel that God might feel that this is “my time” to start a treatment but until then I am on his time and hope that I continue to find some great research on the subject I can share with everyone else. Here is what “Making Babies” has under the POF section (pg 208):

• In POF, the ovaries stop functioning normally in women under age 40. Either the supply of eggs runs out way ahead of schedule or eggs stop responding to FSH and don’t mature. Either of these scenarios causes estrogen to drop because the follicules don’t respond.

• Estrogen will be very low and FSH will be elevated (FSH usually is above 40)

• Case study on a 32 year old woman; hadn’t had a period for 2 years; FSH over 90 with low estrogen; told IVF with donor eggs only option; to see if she had any follicules she was put on low dose estrogen which would only help her ovulate if she had any follicules left; patient ovulated very next cycle and conceived via insemination.

• 10% of women with POF conceive spontaneously

• Dr. Sami David has had success treating POF patients with low dose estrogen which suppresses FSH. If there are any follicules left, blood estrogen levels will rise with this treatment followed by successful ovulation.

• Another case study – early 30’s; low estrogen, high FSH;prescribed herbs to boost yin and clear the heat from her body and product estrogen; incorporated more soy into her diet; took an EFA supplement (I went to whole foods to get this supplement and they suggested just taking an extra tbsp of flaxseed oil); within three months patient’s mood and menopausal symptoms getting better so started weekly acupuncture treatments; by end of 6th month patient was ovulating; conceived.

• Book suggests women with POF are the “Dry” fertility type which means we are yin deficient. Suggests following recommendations for Dry type in the book, seeing a Chinese practioner for help in boosting estrogen and seeing an acupuncturist to promote ovulation.

• Acupuncture & herbs can be useful in lowering FSH and increasing fertility

• Use visualization techniques to lower stress and help normalize FSH (pg 90)

Like always this is going to be TMI but I have noticed lately that my breasts have been hurting for weeks at a time. I read in Making Babies that this could be a sign that I could be conceiving and having early pregnancy loss. In the book one of the doctors prescribed a progesterone supplement and one of the patients was pregnant within three months (pg 212). I wonder if this could be happening to me??? But then I read on another page that an increase in caffeine could be responsible for the breast tenderness. I have also noticed I am able to sleep better at night, my skin has more moisture and isn’t as dry, I have some changes in my CM and my mood is better. These are all good signs pointing to an increase in estrogen. “Making Babies” also has a section on infections and states that “every couple struggling with unexplained infertility ought to be screened for bacteria and infections so mild that they are flying under the radar. It is possible to beat the infection with a good diet and healthy lifestyle but it is possible that you have had the infection for a long time and so the authors recommened taking an antibiotic and adopting a healthy lifestyle.” (pg 253) “25-30% of women treated for infertility carry micro-organisms that can impair fertility which can kill sperm, infect an embryo.” After self diagnosing myself with a gallbladder issue and demanding a urine test from my doctor, I was told I had a small infection show up in my urine. My doctor suggested drinking cranberry juice to try and wipe it out and if on October 29th, the infection was still present, then she would prescribe an antibiotic. So although my diagnosis was yet again incorrect, it led to the discovery of this infection. I was going to just ignore the cranberry juice thing but I think I will be going out to the store before bed tonight to get some cranberry juice and a few other items recommended by the book. Suggestions listed under the “dry” fertility type are:

Food –
• “vegetables & fruits combine with complex carbohydrates and small amount of protein – see pg 297 for suggested percentages of each
• Small portions of protein throughout the day
• Flax and soy production (already doing this and reaping the benefits)
• Seaweed and concentrated green juice (already doing, I could eat more seaweed but don’t really know how, not exactly a yummy and tasty treat unless eaten with sushi)
• Drink at least 8 glasses of water a day
• Has a list of food Chinese medicine considers moistening and lubricating and yin nourishing
• Avoid coffee, black tea, caffeine and sugar
o Has a recipe for Fertili tea for dry types (pg 299)
• Eat more spicy foods

• Choose revitalizing exercise that is replenishing and meditative (yoga, tai chi or walking in nature) – I have been walking on this great path by my home you know becoming one with nature.
• Avoid any exercise extremely exhausting – limit to 30 minutes a day
• Balance exercises that builds bulk

• Get enough sleep
• Try to get fresh air throughout each day
• Limit time sitting in front of computer
• Adopt stress coping strategy to use during the day
• Be patient, could take awhile to get yourself back in balance
• Try visualization and self massages

• EFAs
• L-carnitine – helps with cervical mucus
• Royal Jelly (already taking in my smoothies)
• Liquid chlorophyll – helps with follicule building (already taking)
• Floradix iron supplement (already taking)

Medical Help
• If you are considering taking fertility drugs, the book suggests preparing your body for three months before starting the treatment. Wait until menopausal symptoms have improved or are completely gone.
• Acupuncture and herbs can help get your body ready

Although I am not feeling pressure to get pregnant right this second thanks to Beth Moore, I decided to give one last push on my husband regarding the IVF topic. He has expressed how against he is of using someone elses eggs for IVF and that he would not want to have children with someone else and live that lie. This has been killing me because I have never been the type of women who let someone else make decisions for me (even God and thus I have not wanted to wait). So I decided to push the topic one more time but I choose to bring it up at a time when my husband was in a very good mood on a drive home from a great day in Golden. I voiced my opinion on the matter and asked if he would ever consider it and to my surprise he replied with “maybe once it has been awhile, we are not even two years into trying and some couples have to try a lot longer then that.” That was a good enough answer for me. He was right, I can admit that (just don’t tell him I said that). I had to chuckle as I got out of the car, he asked me what I was laughing about and I just told him I was happy he had changed his mind and he just shook his head. What I was really laughing about was that I had waited to approach the subject with him until the right time and that was one of the other subjects the great bible study had covered. Waiting until the right time. All of the other times I had tried to approach my husband on the IVF subject had been when he was at work or just getting home from work and this relaxing Sunday afternoon was just right. Two new things to make me feel better about my current situation, I have God's plan which I pray will include my cycles coming back and I have the fact that IVF with donor eggs could be a possibility when the time is right. Ahh, finally some peace.

Sunday, September 26, 2010

Aligning my stars

Don’t worry I have calmed down since my last post…well sort of. I am still a little bummed out. While walking to my car yesterday (and feeling sorry myself yet again), I was trying to focus on something else when a couple appeared in front of me. They were running to their car and the woman was holding her bulging pregnant belly. Guess it was time for their baby to arrive….lucky ducks! That is what’s so freakin hard about not thinking about it. Pregnancy and motherhood is literally everywhere. The gym, the office, Starbucks even on E News. Does it seem like a lot of celebrities have been pregnant lately??? I mean come on, I can’t even get a little gossip in now without getting sad and usually that makes me feel better. Oh well, it will happen eventually I have to be strong and in the words of Gloria Gaynor “I will survive.” Just got to keep doing the things I am doing and be healthy and happy. Align the stars and wait to see what happens. Right now it feels like my stars are scattered everywhere. I am really busy at work so I haven’t had time to get the bills organized, the laundry is just piling up, we still haven’t found a new house, I have gained weight and top it off with the fact that I haven’t had a period since last November…like I said they are everywhere. I am working on this though. I have been taking a few minutes each day this week to get paperwork organized, I have been to the gym the past three days and even met with my trainer yesterday, my husband is handling the house situation and I continue to eat flaxseed, yams and soy everyday to help with the estrogen issue I currently am experiencing. On that note….

I have decided that I am going to focus on eating things that support both estrogen production and a healthy endocrine system. Like many southern gals, I prefer to do everything through food. I found a great article at It lists items you need to be sure and eat to support a healthy endocrine system. One suggestion is taking omega oil supplements which I was on way back when I was first diagnosed. Perhaps this is something I should look into taking again??? The article also suggests yoga for stress management and states that there are actually some yoga positions that stimulate hormonal balance. Also listed is garlic which I cook with all the time!

This article caused me to want to find what yoga poses I can be doing so I can be sure and do them once a day since I am obsessive….yes I know I have a problem. During my brief travel on the jam packed information highway this morning, I found another article discussing how different every infertility patient is, the reasons for hormonal imbalances and why they seem to be rapidly increasing and things we as women can do to reverse the imbalances. .

What Can Women Do to Be in Balance?

1. Put themselves first when it comes to health. When women are healthy, everyone who needs them benefits.

2. Walk, garden or relax in the sun for 20 minutes. This produces vitamin D for immunity and bone health and melatonin for sleep.

3. Get plenty of sleep. Cortisol from not sleeping and stress promote weight gain and depression.

4. Eat organic green vegetables and drink organic fresh squeezed juices which contain natural plant sterols. Broccoli and other cruciferous vegetables are particularly helpful in balancing estrogen.

5. Cook in glass or stainless steel. Plastic can have an “estrogenic effect” on the body.

6. Increase exercise, which increases DHEA and other important hormones.

7. Increase weight-training exercises to help build bone mass and stimulate Human Growth Hormone that keeps us young with a positive attitude.

8. Take time to do yoga, meditation and other relaxation exercises which stimulate hormone functions, decrease anxiety and balance brain chemicals.

9. Read books on hormone balance by Johnathan Wright, MD, Uzzi Reiss, MD, or others.

10. Get saliva tested for hormone levels over a period of a month. This test examines your total cycle and is more relevant than a blood test.

11. Go to a health care practicioner who has a long history with hormone balancing. It is a very intricate science.

12. Take a good vitamin made from natural ingredients with antioxidants for food cell function, bone health and hundreds of other body functions.

13. Have fun and laugh. This simple and enjoyable part of life decreases the stress chemicals and helps build the immune system. The bottom line is there are alternatives to the dangerous synthetic hormones that have been prescribed for decades. There always have been. It is up to us to be proactive and seek the solutions that have been around for centuries.

Thought this was such a great article because it suggests we be proactive and not rely on doctors to figure out how to restore balance to our bodies. I wish someone would have given me this article a long time ago. I googled the authors suggested and have a few written by Dr. Uzzi Reiss in my Amazon shopping cart right now. When I go in next week for my gallbladder and thyroid test, I am going to ask about doing a saliva test throughout the month of October to see if anything fluctuates. I am doing most of the other things so I feel like I am on the right track.

A Pep Talk For All You Wonderful Women Out There.....

I promised some friends of mine a few weeks ago that I would stop the obsessive research on how to cure myself….I even made a bet with them and for the last two weeks I have stuck to it. This morning I woke up and checked my blackberry and saw I had my daily update for Team Inspire (RESOLVE). Usually I glance at the daily topics and move on but I went a little further this morning seeing that one of the topic discussions was one I know very well, POF. The person who started the discussion has been diagnosed for a long time and was searching for information on what her options could be.  Seeing this entry of course relit the spark to my need to do research and since then I have scouring through the pages of discussions on POF on the RESOLVE site. I have to say that after doing this, I feel very discouraged and sad. I wasn’t able to find a single story of someone with POF healing their body or conceiving on their own.  I know it may seem a little unrealistic of me, but I still believe I will eventually find out what is keeping my body from ovulating and have a child.  I believe that most of us women who have been diagnosed as POF represent a group where western medicine has just plain failed us.  Basically, there is something wrong with us and doctors don’t want to take the time to find out what it is so they give us the whole “you have premature menopause, but we don’t know why. Sometimes it just happens.” Sorry, I mean I am not a doctor but that explanation is just not acceptable to me especially when it is concerning a process that my body was built to carry out. If a body process has full on shut down, there is a reason for it and that should be a concern to a doctor. I believe that nutrition and lifestyle have a very large part in the growing epidemic of infertility. I also believe that if the same doctors who typically throw aside their patients after their POF diagnosis would just recommend less stress, some yoga and a healthier diet that many of the “infertile” patients would find their problems might be solved.  I also have to say that even after being diagnosed as having “POF” for almost a year and a half, I am still not exactly sure what that means. For the first year, I was told by several doctors that it means I have no eggs and no chances of conceiving. For the past six months, I have been seeing an OBGYN who specializes in working with women with POF who says that I do have eggs just not the hormones to get my body to go through a complete cycle.  I have also read a few books in the past six months that back up my most recent doctor’s opinion on the matter.  Regardless, maybe doctors should figure out exactly what it means to diagnose patients with POF before sending women into the gloom of an infertility diagnosis. I have seen many positive changes in my body over the past year and a half. I went from having flattened ovaries with no eggs and very low hormones to having round ovaries with standing follicles and good levels of hormones. I was able to keep myself from having to go on HRT and have had a few cycles. All of which I was told would not be possible in the first year and a half. Through research of my own, I have had tests run as I see fit to be able to rule possible causes of this problem out and am positive I will eventually find the problem. I believe that my celiacs disease caused some damage and have been on a strict gluten free diet for almost two months.  I am currently looking into thyroid and gallbladder possibilities as thyroid disease runs in my family and I took Yasmin for almost 6 years…for those of you who haven’t heard…the makers of Yasmin & Yaz are in the middle of  lawsuits from women who took their products and suffered severe side effects one of them being gall bladder disease.  All I am saying is to you wonderful women out there who have been diagnosed with POF or any other fertility problem don’t give up. Do some research, change your diet and find a doctor that is up on the topic. Our bodies were made to reproduce and drive men crazy.  Our body wouldn’t shut this process down unless there was a reason for it!!!

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

It's My Rights....Right?

Ok so first let me put this out there…..I don’t know much about Politics mainly because I believe most politicians (if they were wooden puppets) would really long noses. I typically don’t believe much of what comes out of any of their mouths but I saw something on the news last night that really upset me. Some republicans in the state of Colorado (will remain nameless) are currently backing Amendment 62 (Personhood Amendment) that will be voted on this fall. If passed, this amendment would outlaw abortion even for cases of incest and rape and would also outlaw infertility treatments. Now being a Catholic the first issue is just a big no, no but I do believe there are certain circumstances where having that choice is needed. It’s more the second part of the amendment that really frankly pisses me off!! Why should someone be able to make that kind of a decision for a woman??? Why shouldn’t the law abiding, tax paying, hard working women of the state of Colorado have access to infertility treatments? And why should anyone care if they want to have these types of treatments done. You see, we are not all blessed with perfect fertility, or finding a significant other and to me you are taking away a god given right for someone to be a mother by taking away her right to see a fertility specialist. It is taking away our rights to family planning!!!! The argument is that all of the frozen embryos deserved to be loved and adopted and have rights which I agree with but I feel that you are taking away their rights to be loved by not allowing fertility treatments. I am just so angry that this is what our government leaders have come to…trying to control what we can do with our own bodies!!! For some women, like myself, infertility treatments are our only means of trying to conceive. Some of us even pay for healthcare that covers these treatments so that we aren’t thousands of dollars in debt. What I have to say to these government officials is this……do you really think that women across the state would put themselves through brutal fertility treatments if they didn’t have to? Do you really think they are trying to take rights away from the very embryos they are hoping will implant and become their children? What’s next? Are you going to regulate the type of toilet paper we use? Or make it mandatory for women to take birth control? What I do with my body is my own choice. This is an unfair amendment and personally I see it as a form of suffrage. Ok I am done now just had to get that off my chest. I am sorry if I have misspoken about any of the above, remember that I got this off the news while trying to curl my hair and get out the door in time to get to slide into my chair just before the buzzard.

I had lunch with a friend yesterday who has been going through almost the exact same things I have for the past year. We sat and chatted about things we had tried, things strange doctors had said and what our next moves were going to be. I believe my next move is this, no cleansing, no kinesiologist, no supplements. Just me, my friends and family, the gym, a little yoga and enjoying my life. I will or course stick to my gluten free mostly organic diet but I will not let this rule my life anymore. If God wants me to have a child, I will have a child. I am DONE letting this rule my life. I know I have said that before but sorry infertility, I have moved on. The past few weeks I have been having fun. I have lost a little weight, spend lots of time with friends and family and have even been able to enjoy time with my husband without being sad. I like to tell you it has been nice having a relationship with you but we are done. I will give you the old “it’s not you, it’s me.” I don’t want you following me around anymore. I realize I may be forced to see you once in awhile, or you will get mentioned in casual conversations but this exclusive thing we have had for a year and a half is just not good and I am done! See you infertility.

Sunday, September 19, 2010

On a Break.....Or am I?

I am usually not one who believes in taking "breaks", at least when it comes to relationships. I like many others have been fed that line several times and in my opinion if someone feels the need to spend less time with me then maybe they dont need me in their lives at opinoin on breaks has changed since my dianosis. I temporarily take breaks when I feel overwhelemed. Lately I have felt like my constant need to be researching and have my head buried inside a book is spinning out of control. I am also getting very tired of attending doctros appointments and eating super healthy to not see the improvements I am wanting and gaining weight. I have decided to stop taking most of the supplements continuing to take my liquid form of royal jelly and maca powder with my juice in the morining, my probiotics and my iron supplement.  I am going to take a break from cleansing, accupuncture and try more yoga and working out.  I need a break!!! Sorry Mr. Library, but you and I were getting to serious way to fast and my husband is getting jealous. I do want to share my latest self diagnosis with you.  My husband and I recently attended a college football tailgate and game. At the tailgate, I caught up with a friend who I hadnt seen in awhile and to my surprise, she mentioned that she had gone off the pill a littel over a year ago and that she too was having ovulation problems.  My heart dropped as she explained how painful it had been for her and her husband and that she was so tired of all the different kinds of doctors.  Next she explained that she had recently started seeing a chiropractor who was also a natural doctor and that he has recently diagnosed her with a gall bladder problem and had given her some supplements.  We decided that we would have lunch soon and talk about our experiences and see if we might be able to help eachother some time in the upcoming weeks and then went off to enjoy the game. That night while I sat on the couch I was thinking about what my friend had said and decided to start googling gall bladder issues and fertility. To my surprise, I found a link between the two and also found a link between the kidney and the gall bladder.  I called my mom and told her what I had been reading and then she mentioned a friend of hers that had been on Yasmin (the same pill I was on for over 6 years) and had to have her gall bladder removed.  I told her that I had to go do more research and as I scrolled through page after page of information, I realized that maybe my issues could be related to my gall bladder.  Fatigue, hot flashes, black pepper like flakes in urine, sharp pains in the upper right name only a few. I am still convinced that my thyroid is also part of the problem and have read a lot of material that states that just because you are in the "normal" range of .5-5.5 that doesnt mean that range is right for you.  My thyroid was at a .3 on my last blood test.  Below is a list of Symptoms related to thryoid problems that I fall under:
Family history of thyroid problems (my uncle and my grnadmother)
Past history of auto-immune disease (celiacs)
Allergies or sensitivity to gluten
Other pituitary or endocrine diseases (diabetes, PCOS, premature menopause)
Chronic Fatigue
Celiac disease/gluten intolerance
Heavy consumer of soy products
Heave consumer of raw foods
Heart palpitations
Sweating more then usual/feeling hot when others are not
Inappropriate weight gain despite changes in diet and excercise
Hair loss
Itching skin
Abnormally low sex drive (yes I know you may not want to know that...sorry)
Unexplained infertility
Periods have stopped
Constipation (yes I know sorry another overshare)
Shortness of breath
Difficulty falling asleep

and there you have extremely long list of symtoms I currently have...hmmm I think I need to keep reading my new thyroid book......ok so I am taking a break from reading more then one book at a time. I will focus on one at a time so it doesnt seem so overwhelming. That should be easier to keep under control.

Sunday, September 12, 2010


The past few days I have really been feeling down. I just can’t believe it has been since last November since I had a period and that until recently I hadn’t taken gluten out of my diet which means….I have started over again. Kill me now! All of the research I have read says you need to be off gluten for “an extended period of time” before your fertility may¬ be restored. I am going to assume that “an extended period of time” is probably a year or more. This is seriously exhausting. The juicing in the morning, making my “organic and cleaning” lunches everyday, making sure I take my supplements through the day . either preparing my dinner separately from everyone elses or playing twenty questions with a waiter at a restaurant to make sure my meal will be gluten free, making sure I workout for 30 minutes 5-6 times a week and going to my cleansing appointments! It’s all to much and I am still not ovulating, still have headaches and am still child less. I know what you are thinking “patience my dear, patience” but I have been going through this for over a year and a half now. GURRR! Here is what I am thinking, I am thinking of cutting down my cleansing appointments down to twice a month (so I can relax and save some money), finish the bottles of supplements I am currently taking and then cut them out (except for the multi-vitamin, probiotics,royal jelly, maca). I feel that my body is currently overloaded with supplements. That means I will be cutting out lysine, PABA (which I am not currently taking upon request of the kiniesologist), Heavy Metal Detox. I want my body to get healthy on it’s own. I will keep the royal jelly and maca because they are superfoods not just for fertility but for your body in general. I will keep the multi-vitamin because everyone should take a multi-vitamin and I will keep the probiotics in because it is really beneficial to your body to take them. That is it. I will get the liquid form of royal jelly when my pills run out and that way I can dump royal jelly and maca into my juice in the morning which leaves only the probiotics and multi-vitamin for me to remember to take through out each day. One problem solved! I am also going to start going to yoga classes a few times a week. I have noticed that they are only offered from 7-8 PM during the week but I will have to suck it up and get home late those nights. I really think the relaxation will be worth it and very good for me. I believe stress is a huge part of my problem. I have always been the type of person to keep things in and try and make sure everyone else is happy. Well I need to be able to punch things (which I already do in my boxing classes) and to take time to breathe (which I will be doing in the yoga classes). I have an extremely hard time meditating (due to my self diagnosed ADD) so going to a class that forces me to focus will be a very good thing for me to do. According to Belly Bliss where I will be attending fertility yoga “Dr.Alice Domar, researcher at Harvard Medical School, did a study with women who had been trying to get pregnant for a year or more. She put them on a program that included Yoga and exercise, 50% of those on the program became pregnant within a year as opposed to 20% in the control group who were not on the program that included Yoga and fitness.

*Yoga poses that can help with fertility are those that open the hips and increase blood flow to the pelvis, this also can help rebalance the hormones. Certain Yoga poses can also help to stimulate the ovaries. Yoga is a great way to help women reduce their stress levels and relax which can be key when trying to conceive. *20% of those facing fertility issues are considered “idiopathic” meaning doctors are unable to diagnose the reason a woman is unable to get pregnant. Many feel Yoga has helped them relax, believe in their bodies and de-stress which has helped them overcome their fertility complications and become pregnant.” Proof that it will be good for me. The class was great. The instructor is now pregnant. I remember last fall when I attended a few classes she mentioned her and her husband were thinking of trying soon. She helped me work through my stress about infertility and explained that yoga can help me balance my hormones. There were a few parts in the class that requires everyone in attendance to throw there egos out the door and not care what other people think. I of course have no problem throwing my ego out the door, considering I already tell the world about all my digestive and woman issues. The first things we did was chanting which was so amazingly relaxing. Next we were asked to get into table top position and move around freely to try and start to open up the hips. I had my eyes closed but I am sure I looked like a wounded deer trying to move around. I was able to relax my muscles and move quickly into the next pose. I was amazed at how relaxed I felt throughout the class. At the end of the class the instructor had us lay in “corpse pose” which is flat on your back with your arms and legs relaxed. As soon as I laid down, my lower back started throbbing. Then, as if she was reading my mind, the instructor said “feel for any areas in the body that are calling out to you, what do they need? Focus on sending each breathe to that area.” I took a few deep yoga breathes and concentrated on sending them to my lower back. Guess what, my back stopped hurting!!! That is enough proof for me that yoga works! I think I am going to try and practice my chanting and my corpse pose breathing a few times during the week (just don’t want to scare the hubby, any sentence with the words chanting and corpse could probably scare anyone).

I have officially cut out half my supplements with the exception of maca, daily vitamin, probiotics and royal jelly. I am also still drinking the Seven superfood juice and the superfood greens mix in my smoothie. I am no longer taking lysine, PABA or milk thistle. I just want to be as natural as possible and taking what feels like hundreds of supplements just doesn’t feel right. Everything I have left/added in my daily routine wont hurt me it can only make me stronger….just like the saying “if it doesn’t kill me, it will make me stronger”. These are things that just might give my body that extra push it has been wanting. At the gluten free food fair I recently went to, they were passing out a food pyramid that gluten intolerant people should follow. My question is how much of a particular item is considered “one serving?” I mean the grains section suggests at least six servings a day. That sounds like a lot of food but I think I am probably picturing much larger servings then what is recommended. According to below is an explanation of service size:

Even though there is no single chart that details how much of a particular food a serving constitutes, you can click on each food group's heading (see below) for more information on common portion sizes. Also, here's a basic breakdown of the new guidelines: Breads, Cereals, Rice, and Pasta

One serving equals 1 slice of bread; 1/2 cup of cooked rice, pasta, or cereal; or 1 ounce of cold cereal. All of these serving sizes are known as "ounce equivalents" As a general rule of thumb,

1 serving size/ounce equivalent of bread = plastic CD case
2 servings/ounce equivalents of cooked brown rice = a tennis ball

Unlike the Breads, Cereals, Rice, and Pasta group described above, cup size matters when it comes to vegetables. That is, vegetables servings are measured in cups rather than ounces. One serving equals 1/2 cup of raw or cooked vegetables or vegetable juice or 1 cup of leafy raw vegetables.
1 serving size = 1/2 cup of broccoli = a light bulb
1 serving size = 1/2 cup of potato = a computer mouse

Like the vegetable group, cup size matters here, too. One serving equals 1 cup of fruit or 100 percent fruit juice, or 1/2 cup of dried fruit. Because fruits come in so many different shapes and sizes, it's hard to say how many pieces of fruit count as a serving.
Generally, 1 serving size of whole fruit = 1 tennis ball
1 serving size of cut fruit = 7 cotton balls

Milk, Yogurt, and Cheese
One serving equals 1 cup of milk or yogurt, 1.5 to 2 ounces of cheese, and even 1.5 cups of ice cream. Choose low-fat options from this group whenever possible.
1 serving size of cheese = 2 9-volt batteries

Meat, Poultry, Fish, Dry Beans, Eggs, and Nuts
Like the Bread, Cereals, Rice, and Pasta group, serving sizes are also measured in ounce equivalents. One serving or ounce equivalent equals 1 ounce of cooked lean meat, poultry, or fish; 1/4 cup dried beans, after cooking; 1 egg; 1 tablespoon of peanut butter; or 1/2 ounce of nuts or seeds.
3 servings/ounce equivalents of fish = 1 checkbook
3 servings/ounce equivalents of meat or poultry = 1 deck of cards
2 servings/ounce equivalents of peanut butter = 1 roll of 35 mm film or 1 ping-pong ball

Oils measures serving sizes in teaspoons.
1 serving/teaspoon of margarine and spreads = 1 dice
2 serving/teaspoons of salad dressing = 1 thumb tip
Because these oils are found in many of the foods we eat, there may not be a need to add this group to your diet. For example, half of a medium avocado or 2 tablespoons of peanut butter provide 3 and 4 teaspoons or servings of oil respectively, while also counting towards your vegetable or nuts allowance.

I also found information on a law passed in 2006 which made it easier for consumers to check the labels on the foods they were consuming. Since January 2006, all food labels are required to clearly state if the food contains any of the top eight food allergens, including wheat. It is important to remember that wheat free doesn't mean gluten free. Lawmakers are also working to make labels easier for people with celiac disease by requiring companies to identify other components, such as hidden ingredients and barley and rye. The article suggests a list of foods to avoid. They are below:

beer and other grain-based alcohol products
bouillons and broths
breading (such as the coating on breaded chicken cutlets, etc.)
brown rice syrup (frequently made from barley)
cake flour (made from wheat)
caramel color (occasionally made from barley)
communion wafers
creamed or breaded vegetables
dextrin (a rare ingredient, which may be made from wheat; maltodextrin is OK for people with celiac disease)
dry roasted nuts (processing agents may contain wheat flour or flavorings)
fried chicken
french fries (if they've been coated in flour)
gravies and sauces (including some tomato and meat sauces)
imitation bacon, crab, or other seafood
luncheon and processed meats
malt or malt flavoring (usually made from barley)
modified food starch (most food manufacturers will now specify the source of this ingredient; e.g., modified cornstarch, which is OK, or modified wheat starch, which is not)
nondairy creamer
salad dressings
seasonings (pure spices are OK, but check seasoning mixes for gluten-containing additives)
some herbal teas and flavored coffees
soup mixes and canned soups
soy sauce and soy sauce solids (they may be fermented with wheat; don't eat them unless you verify they're OK with a dietitian)
spreads, soft cheeses, and dips
udon noodles
wheat-free products (wheat free does not mean gluten free; many wheat-free cookies and breads contain barley or rye flour, which contains gluten and other gluten-containing ingredients)
yogurts with wheat starch

While we are on the gluten free subject, here is a list of information on items I have recently done some research on:
• Mccormicks seasoning – their site states that all of the their ingredients are listed on the back and if it isn’t listed on the label, it isn’t in the product. All of their one ingredient seasonings, like cinnamon, contain only that one product.
• Burts Bees – all products gluten free (I love the green tea shampoo and conditioner for colored hair..smells so good, they also have a great body lotion with royal jelley and tinted chapstick)
• Sky vodka – I know I said I wasn’t going to drink….but with football seasoning now here and the holidays in the near distant future, I should start drinking a little so that I don’t over do it at tailgates and work parties…don’t you think?
• Bare Minerals – foundations are gluten free. Some of the lipsticks are not. The Boxom lipgloss is gluten free.
• Aveda - - they check their products periodically to determine “allergen content.” Aveda Color Conserve shampoo & conditioner.Lip Saver lip balm SPF 15. Light Elements Smoothing Fluid, Phomollient & Light Elements Defining Whip. Hand Relief for hand lotion. Have other shampoos, conditioners and make up that are also gluten free.

I also recently found some research on treatments currently being researched to treat celiac disease.
• drugs to break down gluten peptides completely, which researchers expect would prevent the immune response
• drugs to inhibit TTG, which would intervene in the chain of events that cause the immune response
• interventions to dampen the genetically controlled factors that lead to the oversensitive immune system (though gene therapy has not been explored)
• drugs to block intestinal permeability (the results of pilot studies appear promising)
• gluten-free diet for the first year of life may prolong or prevent the development of celiac disease among high-risk infants
• probiotic treatment

I received an email back from the doctor I had emailed off of regarding celiac disease and infertility. Below is her response:

“Sounds like you are headed on the right track. Our bodies are meant to reproduce and the body is a very powerful thing. Now that you have the Celiac Diagnosis you can get yourself on track to a better you! My Neice who also has Celiac was told it would take a year of strict gluten avoidance for her body to be healthy enough to have a baby. With this program she now has a healthy toddler and is pregnant once again. You have the right idea, just being gluten free is a great start but by truly eating a natural diet full of heathy foods is key. My theory is that if you can't hunt it, pick it, or gather it you should not eat it. Obviously not everyone is able to go out and hunt and gather their food, so what this means is to avoid all processed foods and foods not found in nature. A healthy diet is full of nutrient rich foods such as fresh fruits and vegetables, nuts, seeds, unpasturized dairy, and organic meats. Your body also needs healthy fats like coconut, olive oil and butter. Pure filtered water is also so very important the body is made up of almost 80% water. In my practice I can also recommend herbs that are wonderful to help with infertility if you are willing to try them, I know with the things listed above they work with your body to heal and balance out your hormones, making it easier to concieve. Trust yourself and believe in the power of your body I have seen the body heal itself from terrible diseases when given what it needs. Please feel free to contact me with any further questions!
Best wishes to your health and happiness!!!”

That’s it for me right now. I am still on my drive down the slow paced information highway. I have been capturing notes from every book I have read so far and will post my reading list as soon as I have some time. I am going to try hot yoga this weekend. has a coupon for $40 you get unlimited yoga classes for a month. I am going to try one class for free and see what I think. I have read that hot yoga is very good for you, and as you know, I am willing to try anything once.

Sunday, August 29, 2010

I'm with Stupid

I have to tell you how just plain dumb I feel right now. Remember how I told you I thought I had been really good about not eating gluten? Well it seems I wasn’t doing nearly as well as I thought. As I start to double check at restaurants I go to, it seems that my favorite “gluten free” dishes aren’t gluten free at all. My favorite dish at Mexican restaurants is fajitas most of the time just veggie. Turns out that 4 out of 5 places put a marinade on the fajitas that has you guessed GLUTEN! The corn chips are also not gluten free because they are usually fried in the same oil as everything else. I go to Cheesecake Factory at least once a month for work and order the same salad each time because I was once told it was gluten free. During a dining experience there yesterday, I asked the waiter to double check. He came back and said that none of their salad dressing were gluten free and neither were the black beans that go on that particular salad!!! I smiled and said, well someone here once told me it was all gluten free and he responded with “well if you didn’t have a reaction maybe it isn’t a big deal.” I then smiled and replied “well it is still a big deal because the allergy causes my immune system to attack itself.” Yes, I was Debbie Downer at my group lunch yesterday but I felt that was a very dumb comment for the waiter to make. Just because I don’t immediately break out in hives as soon as it touches my mouth doesn’t mean isn’t causing my body any damage. This salad and the fajitas I have been ordering could be keeping me from restoring my health and that makes me feel so stupid! The waiter made up for the comment by helping me build a safe, gluten free salad that ended up being pretty tasty. Now that I am “double checking” it is getting more difficult to eat out and it stresses my husband out. I don’t even want to know what else I have been eating that has gluten in it. I thought I had been gluten free for a year and a half (except for the accident at my mother in laws where she bought corn tortillas that still had wheat) but it turns out I have only truly been completely gluten free for two weeks. I have to start over and that is frustrating however I do have hope that this was what I was missing. Perhaps my ovaries haven’t completely clicked on because there was still gluten in my system??? A girl can dream can’t she??? Now all I can do is be very careful, exercise and get in the best shape possible and continue to eat superfoods to build my body back up. I didn’t get a chance to read “It’s my Ovaries Stupid” yesterday, I had a long day. I think I might have been a bit hormonal though, after a very unexpected verbal exchange with an extremely unpleasant woman at a gas station, I just started crying. I thought to myself as I drove off “what the hell am I crying for?” Right then I noticed I kind of had cramps and decided that it was something hormonal …although I am not sure what. Whatever it is….I’ll take it. It’s evidence that there are some hormones left inside me. Since I didn’t make it to the gym last night (due to my uncontrolled emotional breakdown), my father in law and husband put together the old family trampoline for me. I had the best time jumping on that thing, I felt like a kid again and even practiced some of my old cheerleading jumps. After about 20 minutes on that thing I was completely out of breathe and in need of a shower. I have to laugh because I am getting excited even thinking about going home and jumping again tonight. Along with emotional breakdown, yesterday also brought with it some stomach issues that I thought were kind of strange. I am going to blame the probiotics I recently starting taking again. I have read that you can have stomach issues when you first start them. It’s the good vs the bad (good bacteria vs the bad). Perhaps though, it is the hatched parasites that Ann told me about escaping since I didn’t take PABA yesterday??? Man, I feel sexy now. Hey babe, guess what, I have hatched parasites, what should we name them???

After our recent move, I joined the gym my husband and father in law go to. My father in law came home last night with a little goodie bag he had gotten at the gym. It was filled with literature, coupons and samples of new organic and some gluten free products. The only items I can’t eat were a nutrition bar with probiotics that had wheat in it and some sample cat food (guess I could eat it but just don’t have the urge). I love that people are starting to realize how important organic and clean eating is. I am going to research the products and possibly put a few on my next grocery list. Well we have plans to go to dinner tonight at a fish place. Hopefully there is something on the menu I can eat. I am going to go online and do so searching so my husband can relax.

I wanted to mention something I found while looking up an Udos product online (to see if it had gluten in it). Just because something is labeled “gluten free,” doesn’t mean it has absolutely no gluten in it. According to Udos response to the gluten free question, anything with below a certain amount of gluten in it, is considered gluten free. How freakin stupid is that. So you are telling me all of us celaics patients out there have to pay double for our food and treats and there is still gluten in it even though we are paying for gluten free?? Are you freakin kidding me? How is the FDA ok with this? It could still be making us sick!!!

My husband and I went to a gluten free food fair today. Here is a list and my comments on products that were there. I just want to say that the turn out was amazing and I was so excited to get to go around and taste things without worrying about my allergies. There another one schedule in a few weeks at a local vitamin cottage, I can't wait to go!!
Gluten Free Food Fair – August 29th Jefferson County Fairgrounds

• Bobs Red Mill GF Products – have separate milling & packaging department. Gave out coupons and packet of mighty tasty GF hot cereal.
o Have a pizza crust, brownie mix
o Pamphlet with huge list of GF products (70)
o Catalog lists books that are continually sought after and use by their customer base. I thought they all looked interesting but here are a few I will definitely be reading
 The Amazing Flax Cookbook – Jane Reinhardt-Martin
 Art of Cooking with Quinoa – Maria Baez Kijac
 The China Study – Most comprehensive study of nutrition ever conducted – T. Colin Campbell
 Cooking with Coconut flour – Bruce Fife
 The Joy of Veagan baking – Collen Patrick – Gourea
 125 Best Gluten Free Recipes – Donna Washburn & Heather Butt
 Babycakes – vegan, gluten free and sugar free recipes from New York’s most talked about bakery – Erin Mckenna (some recipes call for spelt flour which is not gluten free)
 Cooking Free – 200 flavorful recipes for people with food allergies and multiple food sensitivities – Carol Fenster

• Chipotle was there handing out chips and guacamole – their meats are not marinated in gluten and their chips are safe!

• Carinos Italian was there advertising their gluten free menu and handing out a sample of cooked potatoes

• General mills had a booth that had pamphlets explaining how to read labels. They have hundred of gluten free products and are listed at
o Some brands listed are Larabar, fruit by the foot, chex, Yoplait, progresso and betty crocker

• Cecelias Market Place guid had a booth – website will give you product of the day emails and product alerts –

• Bakery on Main – Granola products. Gave out packet of Cinnamon Raison Granola and a peanut butter chocolate granola bar. Have a 34,000 square foot manufacturing facility with in house gluten testing on every batch of products.

• Bard’s beer – founded by celiacs, made it their mission to give beer back to those who are intolerant to gluten. America’s first gluten free sorghum beer and the only beer brewed with 100% malted sorghum. To find the beer visit or call 1-877-440-2337

• On the border was there handing out a copy of their gluten free menu and a coupon for queso. I especially love they list the alcoholic beverage that don’t have gluten :0)

• Local Denver bakery, Delicious, was there. Gluten free baking

• Diamond Baking Co. – – Boulder and Denver Metro – gluten free dessert catering

• Another booth of locals who are about to launch and had an amazing booth full of truly amazing yummy products was toosies. They will be selling products in all local natural food stores.
o Will be selling all purpose flout, bread mix, brownie mix, muffin mix and pancake/waffle mix

• Schar- company that makes gluten free products was handing out free samples or chocolate covered wafers and a food pyramid for celiac patients. To remind us what we need to be eating to stay healthy.

• Barlean’s Organic Oils had a booth advertising their Omega Swirl. Tasted and looks like a smoothie yet provides optimal levels of vital and essential Omega 3 EPA/DHA. I tried the strawberry/banana and is was really good. They are sold at vitamin cottage. Can be taken straight, mixed with yogurt and blended with smoothies or protein drinks.
o Voted best product of the year by Vitamin Retailer Magazine
o Gold metal winner of American Masters of Taste Awards

• Rudis had a booth and was giving out complete loafs of bread to everyone. I had already purchased the cinnamon swirl a few weeks ago and love it. You cant even tell its gluten free. Today I got a loaf of the multi-grain and will have to let you know what I think.
o There slogan is “gluten free doesn’t mean bread free”
o Have original sandwhich, multi-grain and cinnamon swirl bread

• The Organic Dish – pre-made gluten free and other special diet food
o Can shop at their kitchen in boulder or order online for pick up, delivery or shipping nation wide.
o Food comes ready to cook with instructions

• Bready had a booth. An automatic gluten free baking system. Very large and bulky and is $299.99. You can check it out at

• Simply Boulder culinary sauces – sold at whole foods and vitamin cottage. Very good dipping sauces. Gluten free,agave nectar, dairy free, vegetarian, 100% natural.

• Gluten Free Oats – – tested at Univ of Nebraska Food Allergy Research a

• Kinnikinnick Foods was giving out packets of information – have bread products, doughnuts, personal size pizza crust, waffles, smores, bread crumbs and oreos.
o or
o Gluten free never tasted so good
o To provide Celiacs, people with Autism and other people with special requirements with uncontimated, risk free source of food products.

• Glutenfreeda – gluten free burritos, granola and oatmeal.
o All products produced in our own 100% gluten free facility

• Gluten free passport had a booth. You can download an app on your phone will give you a list of restaurants and menus that you can eat from.

• Jules Gluten Fee –
o Had some amazing desserts
o Author and creator of the flour was there
o The flour looks like it would be really great to use has tapioca starch, potato starch, corn starch, white rice flour, corn flour and Xanthum gum. I am thinking of ordering some, then I wouldn’t have to mix all of these together while cooking.
o The author signed by book that I bought
o Can go to her website for some great GF recipes.

• Minnie Beasley’s Handmade Almond Lace Gourmet Cookies – first let me say that the creator of this cookie is a little intense but they are very good. He said that if you google “best damn cookie ever” his will pop up. Very good and they will ship pretty much anywhere.

• Arbonne cosmetics – all products including make-up, moisturizer and shampoo are gluten free. I asked for a catalog but they were out. I am going to email the consultant I met today and have her mail me one.

• – “where the missing allergy-free menu can be found”
o Search local and national restaurants and bakeries
o Search by allergy, cuisine and neighborhoods
o View allergy free highlighted items and menus
o Stay current with allergy conscious community by using our twitter and facebook feeds

• Happy Bellies – the only organic baby cereal with DHA plus probiotic protection.
o Have formula that is allergy friendly
o Fresh, frozen organic baby meals
o Organic puffs

• Beaujo’s pizza – have gluten and dairy free pizza. I got a preferred discount card for 15% off every purchase. I have never tried this pizza but will make a note to do it soon and let you know what I think.

• The Gluten Free Gal Baking Company
o Gluten free, Soy Free,Dairy Free, Nut Free, Yeast Free, Corn Free, Sesame Free and Refined Sugar Free

• Namaste foods – contain zero gluten, wheat, soy, potato, corn, tree nuts, peanuts, casein or dairy
o Dedicated allergen free facility
o 15 baking mixes, 3 pasta dishes and all natural
o Also listed on a card I picked up is Bread, cookies, pizza crust, vanilla cake, sugar free muffins, perfect flour blend, biscuits pie crust and more, Chocolate and Vanilla frosting, muffins, brownies, spice cake, waffles/pancakes and chocolate cake
o I have tried the spice cake and I believe this is my favorite GF spice cake mix. I recently made the brownies, I thought it was really good but I added some things to it (organic justin’s peanut butter, walnuts, flaxseed and a bit of soy milk.

• Funky Monkey – fruit snacks
o 100% natural, real fruit, delicious,
o Nothing added
o Gluten Free & veagan
o Raw food
o Kosher
o I received a free bag which I will try and get back to you. They also gave out funky monkey temporary tattoos. I am sad to say I can’t find mine but if I could, would proudly be wearing it right now

• Udis Gluten Free Foods
o Made in a 100% dedicated gluten free facility
o Also dairy free, soy free and nut free
o Shown in the brochure is bagels, granola, pizza crust, sandwich bread, cinnamon rolls and muffins
o I haven’t tried their stuff but I got a coupon which means I will try it soon.

• Celiac Spruce Association –
o Handed out a bunch of information
o Flyer on “the gluten free diet and celiacs disease” class being offered taught by a registered dietician with over 20 yrs experience working in the field. Diagnosed herself with celiacs and multiple food allergies.
o Class is $45.00 and includes a copy of a list I bought today. A small bound book listing all safe GF products. Designed to take to the store with you and help decifer which products are safe.

Hope this helps! I received a bunch of literature which I will work look through this week and share. 

Reading Materials/Other Items That Have Helped Me

  • Inconceivable
  • Making Babies by Sami S. David, MD & Jill Blakeway, LAc
  • pre-seed Fertility-friendly Intimate Moisturizer
  • restoring fertility - yoga for optimal fertility dvd - you can feel it working!
  • Taking Charge for Your Fertility by Toni Weschler, MPH
  • The Infertility Cure by Randin Lewis, Ph. D.