Tuesday, February 2, 2010
Morning of Panic!
Today I woke up in a panic around 10:30 PM last night…yes I said woke up, I am a grandma and fell asleep around 8:30 PM. I was soaking wet from a night sweat which immediately sent me into a huge panic. That is the first time since June that I have had a night sweat which immediately makes me think my body is no longer producing the necessary hormones, like estrogen and progesterone. I somehow got back to sleep and then woke up again at 3:00 AM soaking wet again and just decided to get up and get ready for work. I have to wonder if my fertility yoga might be causing my body to try and “work things out” with my endocrine system. What if the yoga is causing my body to try and get the old fertility system moving again and that is why I had the night sweats? Why else would I be getting them again, all of a sudden after over 6 months? I have started eating dairy again and did have a huge chocolate weight watchers ice cream bar before I went to bed, maybe my change in diet after 6 months also had something to do with it?? I am just not convinced that my fertility is never going to come back. I still maintain that after 10 years on the pill and eating gluten/flour when I have Celiacs have caused my body to go into some kind of shock. The endocrine system is one of the most delicate in the body and any doctor will tell you that no one knows for sure what the pill does to women’s bodies….but lets prescribe it to millions of women like its candy instead of teaching us the signs of when we are most fertile! I am now forced to wait until March to see another doctor. I called the reproductive endocrinologist’s secretary again yesterday and the license is in but now starts the scheduling. I was told the doctor would start seeing patients around March 1st and that I was on the list of people who needed to be scheduled. Let the waiting begin….again…… I called another obgyn that a family friend referred me too. He is very popular in the Denver area and is known for taking the fertility specialist rejects and has helped many get pregnant. My family friend encouraged me to give it a try. I had an appointment in January but had cancelled due to weather and just now decided to call and reschedule. The only problem is that he also can’t see me until March 1st. I am however on a waiting list and am hoping I get a call before March 1st. I am reluctant to wish March upon me because that will mean I will only have one month until I have been off the pill for 1 year and once you have been off the pill for one year and are not pregnant…you are deemed “infertile”. Yes, the month of April bring Easter, a trip to Vegas, my 29th (not 30th) birthday and a definite diagnosis of me being infertile! So I am going to leave you with this today, a friend of mine at work grew up in a Mormon compound. One of the women in the compound was unable to have children so each of the other women in the compound gave birth to one child and gave it to the “infertile” woman. The infertile women produced milk for each of the children she mothered even though she was not the one who gave birth to them. So I ask you this, if her body could produce milk when she wasn’t even pregnant, why cant our bodies heal and do other miraculous things? This story although strange in more than one way is very encouraging because it just proves to me how amazing the human body is and that no one, not even the most prestigious doctors, know exactly what our bodies are capable of…and that my friends is why I am not giving up! I am however choosing to cut dairy out of my diet again….at least until the next chocolate craving..and am going to continue the fertility yoga dvd. I have cramps again today and I really think that is what caused the night sweats…it is working! Having Tuesday everyone!