My Story

Hi there, welcome to my blog. Yes I am a drama queen and yes I have been deemed “infertile” by a few of the medical experts in the great State of Colorado but that hasn’t made me give up my quest to have children quite yet. My husband and I have been on the emotional roller coaster of infertility since March of 2009 when I stopped taking birth control after being on it for ten straight years. I have been keeping a journal since the start of this process and thought I would share it with all of the other incredible women out there who may be going through the same thing or similar thing that I am. At age 28, I have been diagnosed with Premature Ovarian Failure (POF). With no history of fertility problems on either side of my family and normal periods before going on the pill, I was left to accept that I have this condition and that there is no medical explanation for it. Since receiving this diagnosis from a fertility specialist in May 2009, I decided I simply wasn’t going to accept that I wasn’t going to have children with my own eggs. I jumped into the world of Eastern Medicine, worked with an Endocrinologist and even went on a fertility diet trying to get my ovaries to start functioning normally. The conclusion I have come to is this…..having Celiac Disease (Gluten/Flour intolerance) and continuing to eat flour throughout most of my childhood and part of adulthood caused my body to produce anti-bodies that have now started attacking the organs/glands in my body. After a visit to an endocrinologist in December 2009, it was determined that I have ovarian antibodies which are essentially antibodies produced by my body that only attack the endocrine system. No doctor has actually confirmed my self diagnosis that the Gluten Intolerance caused this but Celiac Disease is an auto immune disorder and any auto immune disorder can cause your body to attack itself. I am currently waiting to see a Reproductive Endocrinologist to see what the next steps for me will be. I have read that doctors can try and stimulate the Pituitary Gland to get your Endocrine System running again or that you can be given steroids to help restore ovary function. I am hoping to receive one of these treatments in the near future but only time will tell. In the past 10 months, I have watched many of my close friends become pregnant while I remain a sad statistic. This blog contains my thoughts as I struggle through the process of figuring out what in the world is going on with my body and how I continue to try to stay upbeat and positive about my fertility and enjoy my life. I hope that my blog can help others would love to hear from other women going through the same thing, inspiring stories or anyone who just needs encouragement. I know and understand how difficult every day can be once you have received the POF or infertile diagnosis and want you all to know that I am here for you. Please note that some of you may feel I am sharing to much information (TMI) and for that I am sorry. If you want to read my blog…you get all the details. You never know what will be helpful to someone else right? God bless everyone and I wish you luck on your fertility adventures:0) Remember mind over matter!

My intent is to raise awareness of the issues. Please do not rely on this or any other article when making decisions that will affect you and your health. These are things I have decided to try after much research.
I am sorry I have to even ask, but this research stuff is starting to get expensive. I am just asking for $1.00 donation for posts you feel have helped you. I will use all donations to help fund my research and doctors appointments and of course report back to you. Baby dust to all of you and dont worry we will all find a way to have children.

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Today on Economically Organic:
Save the carrot shaving from your juicer and make carrot cake or carrot muffins yummy! You can also save them to put in a salad.

Infertile – a horrible word used to make women who are already feeling bad about themselves want to jump into a pool of chocolate fudge and eat their sorrows away only to realize that not only can they not get pregnant but now they don’t fit in their clothes. A word so easily tossed around by doctors that they don’t even realize they are saying it and a word that you never under any circumstances should google unless you want your brain to explode.

Monday, March 22, 2010

Dear Ovaries....I hope you start producing...I am counting on you

So, my faith in the human race is quickly deteriorating. I was finishing my run on the track at the gym this morning when I came around a corner just in time to see a woman who was climbing off an elliptical, pass out. As she was climbing off the machine she lost consciousness, went into a dead fall, hit her head on the weight machine next to the machine she had been on and was down in front of me. I ran over to the women, her eyes and mouth were wide open, she was shaking and there was blood and water all over the floor. She had cracked open her head on impact with the weight machine and dropped her water as she fell. I immediately leaped over the railing to the track and let the front desk know they needed to call the paramedics and then went back over to help. By then two other people were bent over her trying to help. I was amazed that as this woman fell, hit her head and started to shake…no one but myself and the two other people helping even flinched…and the gym was packed. There were actually people on the track who were jogging around her. All I could think is “what is wrong with these people!!??” Someone could have just died and they were all to concerned about keeping up their heart rates to even stop and make sure this woman was all right. When I had lept over the railing to tell the front desk, there was actually a man riding a bike and reading his newspaper who asked me what was going on and then just said “oh” after I told him and looked back down at his paper and continued on his bike merry little bike ride. Really? How would any of those people who didn’t act concerned feel if it were one of their loved ones that had fallen and no one seemed to care??? I am happy to report that the woman seemed to be fine. She re-gained consciousness and was talking and laughing as she was wheeled away by the paramedics. Even with the large, bed on wheels being pushed through the track to get to the elevator, people were still running around it. People amaze me! This incident at the gym caused me to be a bit behind this morning so I wasn’t able to grab breakfast at home before I left. As I walked into my work building, I decided to run into the convenience store on the first level and grab a banana for breakfast. I had thrown myself together and had my hair up in a pony tail (not even thinking about the seeds in my ears that were held in place with band aids as part of my acupuncture treatment). As I walked up to the register and handed the cashier the banana, she started talking to me almost yelling at me, “DO YOU NEED A RECEIPT?” I just smiled and said “No” and then she loudly said “OK”, “THANKS FOR COMING IN”. I was a bit confused as to why this woman would find the need to talk to me so loudly. I just let it go and rode the elevator up to my floor, “maybe she has a hearing problem” I thought to myself. I decided to stop for a potty break on my way in. As I walked into the bathroom, I checked out the thrown together look I was sporting in the mirror…and then it hit me. There in the reflection staring back at me were the band aids in my ear. I realized that the seeds kind of looked like a hearing aid…the cashier probably thought I had a hearing aid…and then it all made sense. I decided to take my hair down for the remainder of the day, no matter how horrible it looks. And now a brief update…Over the weekend my temperature stayed at 97.1 and this morning was 96.4….maybe this is the dip I have been waiting for before the peak in temperature??? Yesterday I didn’t have fertile CM but was encouraged at what I saw this morning before leaving for work. I still don’t have the stretchy stuff but I am keeping my fingers crossed. The ovaries and I talked on our ride into work today so I am encouraged they will pull through on their first major project since coming back from leave. Hope everyone has a great Monday!

Reading Materials/Other Items That Have Helped Me

  • Inconceivable
  • Making Babies by Sami S. David, MD & Jill Blakeway, LAc
  • pre-seed Fertility-friendly Intimate Moisturizer
  • restoring fertility - yoga for optimal fertility dvd - you can feel it working!
  • Taking Charge for Your Fertility by Toni Weschler, MPH
  • The Infertility Cure by Randin Lewis, Ph. D.