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My Story

Hi there, welcome to my blog. Yes I am a drama queen and yes I have been deemed “infertile” by a few of the medical experts in the great State of Colorado but that hasn’t made me give up my quest to have children quite yet. My husband and I have been on the emotional roller coaster of infertility since March of 2009 when I stopped taking birth control after being on it for ten straight years. I have been keeping a journal since the start of this process and thought I would share it with all of the other incredible women out there who may be going through the same thing or similar thing that I am. At age 28, I have been diagnosed with Premature Ovarian Failure (POF). With no history of fertility problems on either side of my family and normal periods before going on the pill, I was left to accept that I have this condition and that there is no medical explanation for it. Since receiving this diagnosis from a fertility specialist in May 2009, I decided I simply wasn’t going to accept that I wasn’t going to have children with my own eggs. I jumped into the world of Eastern Medicine, worked with an Endocrinologist and even went on a fertility diet trying to get my ovaries to start functioning normally. The conclusion I have come to is this…..having Celiac Disease (Gluten/Flour intolerance) and continuing to eat flour throughout most of my childhood and part of adulthood caused my body to produce anti-bodies that have now started attacking the organs/glands in my body. After a visit to an endocrinologist in December 2009, it was determined that I have ovarian antibodies which are essentially antibodies produced by my body that only attack the endocrine system. No doctor has actually confirmed my self diagnosis that the Gluten Intolerance caused this but Celiac Disease is an auto immune disorder and any auto immune disorder can cause your body to attack itself. I am currently waiting to see a Reproductive Endocrinologist to see what the next steps for me will be. I have read that doctors can try and stimulate the Pituitary Gland to get your Endocrine System running again or that you can be given steroids to help restore ovary function. I am hoping to receive one of these treatments in the near future but only time will tell. In the past 10 months, I have watched many of my close friends become pregnant while I remain a sad statistic. This blog contains my thoughts as I struggle through the process of figuring out what in the world is going on with my body and how I continue to try to stay upbeat and positive about my fertility and enjoy my life. I hope that my blog can help others would love to hear from other women going through the same thing, inspiring stories or anyone who just needs encouragement. I know and understand how difficult every day can be once you have received the POF or infertile diagnosis and want you all to know that I am here for you. Please note that some of you may feel I am sharing to much information (TMI) and for that I am sorry. If you want to read my blog…you get all the details. You never know what will be helpful to someone else right? God bless everyone and I wish you luck on your fertility adventures:0) Remember mind over matter!

My intent is to raise awareness of the issues. Please do not rely on this or any other article when making decisions that will affect you and your health. These are things I have decided to try after much research.
I am sorry I have to even ask, but this research stuff is starting to get expensive. I am just asking for $1.00 donation for posts you feel have helped you. I will use all donations to help fund my research and doctors appointments and of course report back to you. Baby dust to all of you and dont worry we will all find a way to have children.

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Save the carrot shaving from your juicer and make carrot cake or carrot muffins yummy! You can also save them to put in a salad.



Infertile – a horrible word used to make women who are already feeling bad about themselves want to jump into a pool of chocolate fudge and eat their sorrows away only to realize that not only can they not get pregnant but now they don’t fit in their clothes. A word so easily tossed around by doctors that they don’t even realize they are saying it and a word that you never under any circumstances should google unless you want your brain to explode.

Sunday, November 7, 2010

Love Thy Hormones

If one more person asks me if I am feeling ok, I am going to scream!! Everyone at my office & at home seems to think I am not feeling well because I seem relaxed and have been really laid back. Come to think of it, I feel really relaxed and laid back (am I that big of a stress case that people immediately notice when I start to relax???....I even know that answer to that question, after all stress is my middle name. I am proud to say that I now know what it feels like to not be stressed out throughout each and every work day. I don’t know if it is my new jasmine dispensing air freshener in my office, the new heating pad I have brought to work (to keep my uterus warm…I didn’t say it wasn’t weird but I have read it works), the DHEA supplements or the low dose hormones but I have to say I feel fantastic. Until recently I always seemed to have a tiny headache all the time, and I just noticed yesterday that it is gone. I feel like my head is clear and I am able to remember things more easily. My skin also seems to have a new glow to it… I am basically in a constant state of euphoria :0) I noticed the change in my mood on Monday night and have already decided that the low dose hormones were exactly what I needed and even if they don’t eventually help me conceive naturally, it was the right decision to start taking them. My hormones were hanging on to healthy levels by a tiny hair like thread and the new addition has knocked them into what feels like fully functioning doses.  I am hopeful I will continue to feel even better as the months pass.  I am really interested to see if the DHEA will have any amazing effects on me as it did for the woman in the article I shared with you in my last post. If it made the patient in the article’s 46 year old ovaries behave like they were 20, will it make my 29 year old ovaries behave like they are 14?  Let’s hope so but let’s shoot for after the onset of menses because pre-puberty would be no period and I already know what that feels like :0)  I have a new strategy for every time I start to think about my fertility. I start taking deep breathes and concentrate on my breathing. When you do that not only does it relax your body but trying to focus on taking deep breaths helps clear your mind as well.  Hopefully after awhile I will program myself to not think about it. After all, I don’t have to worry until November 2012 so let the fun begin :0)

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Reading Materials/Other Items That Have Helped Me

  • Inconceivable
  • Making Babies by Sami S. David, MD & Jill Blakeway, LAc
  • pre-seed Fertility-friendly Intimate Moisturizer
  • restoring fertility - yoga for optimal fertility dvd - you can feel it working!
  • Taking Charge for Your Fertility by Toni Weschler, MPH
  • The Infertility Cure by Randin Lewis, Ph. D.